Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-11-06

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

It is important for children, young adults, working people and the retired to have at least one hobby.

What's your opinion about this?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Hobbies always change the lives of the people in this current generation. Having a beneficial and memorable hobby will profit them in the future. It is extremely essential to have a hobby for different age group such as children, young adults, workers and retired ones. I would certainly agree that each age group should have a hobby.

The first reason is practice makes a man perfect, though it is a quatation but it could be attributed to everyone. Minors and teenagers should be having a habbit of reading books. This hobby will definitely help the children and young adults to achieve success in their career building. For instance, If the school going students and major persons have a habbit of reading books, that will equip them to aquire more knowledge and they will have brighter future.

In addition to this, working individuals and retired people also should have a habbit of helping and sharing their knowledge and work experience with other persons. Workers go to different fields for work, the repeated action of their hardwork will give them experience. While, the retired persons are alredy benefitted with their vast years of experience in the different sectors. This cooperation and collabaration will transform the society. For example, If working and retired people have a habbit to serve the people by sharing their techiques to others, it will be convenient for them to be successful in life.

In conclusion, in my opinion all must have one good hobby to prosper in life. i strongly believe that having a positive hobby can add beauty to each ones' life.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

Your position is clear: you agree that people of every age should have a hobby, and you give relevant examples involving reading and sharing experience. The response addresses the main question, but the reasons do not always explain why these activities are hobbies or how they benefit each age group. For example, the paragraph about workers and retired people shifts from hobbies to work experience and serving others, so the connection to the prompt is not fully clear. The reading example is relevant, but its benefits are asserted rather than illustrated in detail. To strengthen the response, explain what makes each activity enjoyable or personally meaningful, and develop one specific example showing its effects on an individual or community.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The essay has a clear overall structure: an introduction states your view, two body paragraphs present reasons, and a conclusion restates your opinion. Linking phrases such as “The first reason,” “In addition to this,” and “For instance” help readers follow the sequence. However, some connections are mechanical, and the progression within the second body paragraph is less clear: it moves from workers’ repeated work to retired people’s experience, then to cooperation and success, without fully explaining how these points connect to having a hobby. The conclusion also repeats the central opinion rather than drawing the reasons together. Use clearer transitions between related ideas and organise each paragraph around one developed point, with an example that directly supports it.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use vocabulary relevant to the topic, including “career building,” “experience,” “cooperation,” and “collaboration,” and the meaning is generally understandable. There are also attempts to use more formal expressions, such as “prosper in life.” However, several word choices and collocations are inaccurate or unnatural, including “profit them in the future,” “major persons,” and “serve the people by sharing their techniques.” Spelling errors such as “quatation,” “habbit,” “aquire,” and “collabaration” are noticeable and reduce the accuracy of the writing. Aim for more natural, precise phrases and check spelling carefully. Repeating “hobby” and “experience” can also be reduced by using suitable alternatives where the meaning remains clear.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mix of simple and more complex sentences, including a concession with “though” and conditional examples beginning with “If.” The main ideas can usually be understood, but errors in sentence construction and grammatical forms recur. For example, “It is extremely essential to have a hobby for different age group” needs a plural form and a more natural structure, while “Workers go to different fields for work, the repeated action…” joins two independent clauses incorrectly. The sentence beginning “While, the retired persons…” is also incomplete as written, and “all must have one good hobby” would be clearer with an appropriate subject construction. Practise accurate clause joining, articles, plurals, and sentence boundaries, while retaining your attempts at complex structures.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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