Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-11-11
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
It is important for children, young adults, working people and the retired to have at least one hobby.
What's your opinion about this?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
In the recent years, It is seen that to compete to the world's race, people are forgetting themselves. I do strongly believe that, It is very important for children, young adults, working people and the retired to have at least one hobby.
As the world is evolving, everyone is so busy with their schedule that they barely have time for themselves and they leave behind everything they love to do, but in long term this is very unfavourable for a person's mental heath. Later, when they will look back and will realise what they have left behind, this guilt will make them feel very bad. They left themselves in the busy life struggling to fight and meet the standards set up by the world.
Taking my personal example, I used to go to swimming class when I was a kid, later I got so busy with life that I dodn't even realise when I lost that passion and happiness I used to get after my swimming classes.
It doesn't depend in what life stage your are, doing what makes you happy is not just important for your metal being but as well for your physical being. If you are not happy, relaxed and taking out time for yourself, will also attract various diseases into your body. You will not even realise the slow changes that your body will face and the signals it will provide you.
As a conclusion, a person must take some time out for themselves and figure out what they want to do apart from their daily routine to diversify their mind and relax themselves.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0
Your position is clear from the introduction: you strongly support having a hobby, and the response stays focused on its benefits. You give relevant reasons, including relaxation, mental well-being and physical health, and the swimming example makes the discussion more personal. This addresses the task, but some points are less fully explained than others. For instance, the claim that not taking time for oneself can lead to “various diseases” is broad and would be more convincing with a specific explanation or example. The discussion also focuses mainly on the effects of losing a hobby, rather than showing how hobbies benefit different age groups. Develop those points with concrete examples to make the argument more complete.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5
The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, paragraphs giving reasons and a personal example, and a conclusion. The ideas generally follow a sensible order, moving from the pressures of a busy life to personal and health-related effects. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes unclear, and links can feel mechanical. For example, “Later, when they will look back” shifts abruptly from the general point about busy schedules, while “Taking my personal example” introduces the anecdote without connecting it clearly to the preceding claim. The conclusion repeats the central message but does not draw together the main reasons. Use clearer links between claims and examples, and make each paragraph develop one main point in sequence.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.5
You use enough vocabulary to communicate your opinion and discuss well-being, with phrases such as “busy life,” “passion and happiness,” and “daily routine.” There are also attempts at more specific expressions, including “standards set up by the world” and “diversify their mind.” However, several word choices and collocations are inaccurate or unnatural, which limits precision: “compete to the world's race,” “mental heath,” and “metal being” are examples. Some wording is also repetitive, particularly the repeated references to being busy and taking time for oneself. Aim for more natural collocations and check spelling carefully; more precise vocabulary would make your ideas clearer and more persuasive.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5
You attempt both simple and complex sentences, including clauses with “that,” “when,” and “if,” so there is some variety in structure. Most of the meaning remains understandable, but some grammatical errors affect accuracy. For example, “It doesn't depend in what life stage your are” has errors in the preposition and clause structure, and “If you are not happy, relaxed and taking out time for yourself, will also attract…” lacks a clear grammatical subject for “will attract.” The future forms in “when they will look back and will realise” are also not well controlled in this time clause. Review sentence boundaries, subject–verb structure, and tense choices, then proofread punctuation and capitalisation to improve control.
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