Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-11-13

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

It is important for children, young adults, working people and the retired to have at least one hobby.

What's your opinion about this?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Having a hobby in anyone person is important to thier daily life it makes thier body stronger.It alows thier body move faster and they didn't feel hurt.It helps for the mental and strengten thier body.One example is playing basketball for those kids.Thier develop thier skills they can practice an sports that help them to achive to be an athlete someday.The benifits of thier hardwork playing basketball maybe someday will be use in the future.I see many supper star in basketball are starting only for a hobby.They play one on one to thier freinds outside playing basketball they learn a lot of things. They build a freindship,practiceng to be kind to other,learn how to be patience.It might be a simple hobby but its good to all children's in our society.Also for our retired worker they must be have a something to make them stronger everyday.They can do walking and jogging uotside.Waking can makes them healtier that thier muscles cannot stock.Strech thier body make them sweat breathing so easy helps a heart healthy too.May injoy jogging and they can roaming aruond to the village it helps to energized thier mind and body.Maybe also build a frienship in the community meet some people aruond talk each other have some conversation telling what's happen and whats going on thier community.That's a lot ao benifits of a having a hobby.I also have a hobby for my self a playing guitar and makes me feel better

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You clearly support the idea that hobbies are important and give relevant examples, including basketball for children, walking or jogging for retired people, and playing the guitar yourself. These examples show an attempt to address different age groups. However, the response only partially develops the task: working people and young adults receive little or no specific attention, and several benefits are asserted rather than explained. For instance, the discussion of basketball lists skills and friendship but does not fully show how these benefits support your opinion. Your personal example at the end is also very brief. The response is 10 words below the required minimum, which further limits the space available to develop your reasons. Explain each example more fully and cover all groups named in the prompt.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

The response has a recognisable overall direction: it moves from children and basketball to retired people, then ends with your own hobby. This gives the reader some sense of organisation, and examples are generally connected to the main opinion. However, the writing is presented as one long block, so the shifts between groups and ideas are difficult to follow. Connections between sentences are often unclear or repetitive, particularly in the extended discussion of jogging and community interaction. Basic linking words such as “also” and “maybe” appear, but they do not consistently show how one point relates to the next. Use separate paragraphs for the introduction, each main group, and the conclusion, and organise each paragraph around one clear reason with supporting detail.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use a basic range of relevant vocabulary, including “hobby,” “skills,” “friendship,” “community,” and “healthy,” which helps communicate your main examples. There are also attempts to express benefits beyond physical health, such as patience and social connection. However, vocabulary is limited and repeated, and frequent spelling errors make some phrases difficult to understand, for example “strengten,” “benifits,” and “freindship.” Several word combinations are unnatural or unclear, such as “muscles cannot stock” and “build a friendship” in the intended context. Aim to learn accurate collocations and check spelling carefully. More precise terms such as “maintain muscle strength,” “develop social skills,” and “improve mental well-being” would help you explain your ideas clearly and avoid repeating general words like “good” and “helps.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You attempt to connect ideas and give explanations, but the response relies mainly on simple sentence patterns, and attempts at longer structures are often faulty. Errors in sentence boundaries and punctuation are frequent: for example, “Having a hobby in anyone person is important to thier daily life it makes thier body stronger” joins several ideas without clear separation. Verb forms and agreement are also inconsistent, as in “They can do walking,” “Waking can makes,” and “they didn't feel hurt.” Articles and sentence construction cause further difficulty in phrases such as “a playing guitar.” These errors sometimes make the intended meaning hard to follow. Practise writing complete sentences with one main clause and a clearly connected supporting clause, then check subject–verb agreement, verb patterns, and punctuation.

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