Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-09-08

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

It is important for children, young adults, working people and the retired to have at least one hobby.

What's your opinion about this?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

hobbies can reduce stress from studies and work and also making hobbies improve mood and add people can get relaxation from their professional life and educational life. I will explain this point of you in further paragraphs with relevant examples, and also I will give you my own opinion.

hobbies can give relaxation and also reduce an anxiety from the work lifestyle and studies for youngsters. moreover, people can grow their inner skills and improve their confidence. To paraphrase this point of view, some hobbies creates opportunity to meet new people and also grow creativity and discipline. For example, joining sports club can improve fitness level and also reduce stress from daily routine.

in my opinion, I strongly believe that pursue hobby is good for essential for people of all edges. retired people can reduce loneliness also, they can stay active at the older age. For instance, choose a hobby for older people, can stay happy, meet new peoples and they can boost self-confidence. By choosing a hobby at the retired age, socialising with other people can reduce loneliness and also improve mental and physical health.

To conclude, children and older people can improve creativity and also social skills by choosing a hobby and it’s also beneficial for every age of people which can reduce stress,anxiety and can develop social skills, improve mental and physical health and also can maintain their professional and educational lifestyles.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response addresses the prompt by discussing the importance of hobbies for different age groups. However, the essay is under the 250-word minimum, which limits the depth of development. While the ideas are relevant, they are somewhat repetitive and lack specific, detailed examples. For instance, the mention of 'joining sports club' is a good start but is not expanded upon to show a clear impact. The position is clear, but the overall development is insufficient to reach a higher band. To improve, you should aim to expand on your points with more concrete illustrations and ensure you meet the word count requirement to allow for full development of your arguments.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organised into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or repetitive, such as the frequent use of 'and also'. Some transitions are awkward, such as 'To paraphrase this point of view', which is used incorrectly as it does not actually paraphrase the previous sentence. The progression of ideas is somewhat disjointed, and the lack of sophisticated linking words makes the flow feel a bit simplistic. Improving the variety of your cohesive devices and ensuring they are used in the correct context will significantly enhance the coherence of your writing.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but lacks the range and precision required for higher bands. There is significant repetition of basic words like 'hobbies', 'people', and 'improve'. You also make some collocation errors, such as 'pursue hobby' (should be 'pursuing a hobby') and 'all edges' (likely meant 'all ages'). The vocabulary is functional but does not demonstrate an ability to use less common items or idiomatic language effectively. To improve, focus on learning synonyms and collocations related to lifestyle, mental health, and personal development to avoid repetitive phrasing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The essay contains a mix of simple and some attempted complex structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Examples include 'making hobbies improve mood' (awkward phrasing), 'reduce an anxiety' (incorrect article usage), and 'choose a hobby for older people, can stay happy' (faulty sentence structure). Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with comma usage. While the meaning is generally understandable, the frequency of errors in basic grammar—such as subject-verb agreement and article usage—prevents the essay from reaching a higher band. Focus on proofreading for basic sentence construction and subject-verb agreement.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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