Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-09-11
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
It is important for children, young adults, working people and the retired to have at least one hobby.
What's your opinion about this?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
In today's era, a large proportion among the youth wasting most of their time on smart devices for entertainment, which is degrading their academic performance, social contacts and fitness. Even though busy schedules of their elders and their own loneliness are the key reasons behind this, it can be tackled by providing them required time and attention.
The first reason, why young generation's screen time has increased dramatically, is their parents' hectic schedule during their early age. People usually introduce tech products to their children in early age to manage their all responsibilities toward family and work, which make them habitual about screen until young age. The second reason is that every person in present world is so busy for earning money that they do not have time for family, this causes the feeling of being lonely. As a result, young people move towards social media and devices to escape from their loneliness.
However, this issue can be resolved if parents spend time with their children and install good habits of outdoor activities in their early age as well as avoid introducing screen in their early age. Another
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.0
The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 250 words, reaching only 188 words. This significantly impacts the development of ideas. While you introduce the topic of screen time and hobbies, the essay is incomplete, ending abruptly mid-sentence. You have not addressed the prompt's requirement to discuss the importance of hobbies for different age groups (children, young adults, working people, and the retired). Instead, you focused exclusively on the youth and screen time. To improve, you must ensure all parts of the prompt are addressed and provide a full, structured essay that meets the length requirement.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The essay shows some attempt at logical organization, with an introduction and body paragraphs. However, the abrupt ending severely disrupts the coherence of the piece. You use some cohesive devices like 'The first reason' and 'The second reason', which helps the flow, but the lack of a conclusion and the incomplete final paragraph make the overall structure fragmented. To improve, ensure that each paragraph is fully developed and that you include a clear concluding summary that ties your arguments together.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
Your vocabulary is generally adequate for basic communication, using terms like 'academic performance', 'hectic schedule', and 'social media'. However, there are some awkward collocations and word choices, such as 'wasting most of their time on smart devices' (better: 'spending excessive time on digital devices') and 'install good habits' (better: 'instill good habits'). The range is somewhat limited, and the vocabulary does not demonstrate the flexibility required for higher bands. Focus on using more precise academic collocations and synonyms to express your ideas more effectively.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
There are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text. For example, 'a large proportion among the youth wasting' should be 'a large proportion of the youth waste'. You also have issues with article usage ('in early age' should be 'at an early age') and sentence structure. While you attempt some complex sentences, they often contain errors that affect clarity. To improve, focus on subject-verb agreement, correct preposition usage, and ensuring that your sentences are complete and grammatically sound. Proofreading for basic errors is essential.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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