Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-09-11
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
It is important for children, young adults, working people and the retired to have at least one hobby.
What's your opinion about this?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
People at present are using electronic gadgets and online platforms more spending time which lead to weakening their studies, bonding with others and physical and mental capacity.Thus, this cause due to lack of attention
Firstly, teenagers spending time on phones make them unhealthy because they lack in getting attention from their parents. When infants cry, parents put videos onTV so that children can watch TV and let the parents do their work wthout any disturbance. For ecample in my relatives' house, both the parents are working, and they do not give much time to their children; instead, they provide them the cellphones and other electronic gadgets so that they get busy and let them do their work. Another reason affecting them is relationship. when both the parents are working, they hire a nanny to take care of their iinfants,and from their childhood they are more connected to their carergiver rather than their parents.
In order to overcome this problem, there are some measures that we can take to solve this problem. Firstly, we should play with our cchildren insteadof giving them cellphones and gadgets; this will make them to be less dependent on phones in their free time and find other physical activities to do in their garden or oustide home like playinf football and basketball.Secondly, parents should make their schedule in away that they are taking care of their children by themselves. Instead of a nanny, they can also call their parents to come home to take care of their children if their work schedule is very tight .
In conclusion, spending more time using smatphones
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.0
The response fails to address the specific prompt, which asks for your opinion on the importance of hobbies for different age groups (children, young adults, working people, and the retired). Instead, the essay focuses entirely on the negative impact of electronic gadgets on children and the role of parents. Because the response does not discuss hobbies or the various age groups mentioned in the prompt, it is largely off-topic. While there is an attempt to present a position, the content does not fulfill the requirements of the task.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The essay is divided into paragraphs, but the logical progression is weak. The introduction is disjointed, and the conclusion is incomplete, ending abruptly mid-sentence. While some cohesive devices like 'Firstly' and 'In order to overcome' are used, they are often mechanical. The lack of a clear central argument related to the prompt makes the overall structure difficult to follow. Referencing is sometimes unclear, and the flow between ideas is frequently interrupted by grammatical errors.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary is limited and repetitive. Basic terms such as 'electronic gadgets', 'working', and 'children' are used frequently. There are several spelling errors, such as 'wthout', 'ecample', 'iinfants', 'carergiver', and 'smatphones'. The range of vocabulary is insufficient to express complex ideas or demonstrate a flexible use of language. The word choice is generally functional but lacks the precision and variety required for higher band scores.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The essay contains frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede communication. Examples include 'this cause due to lack of attention', 'teenagers spending time on phones make them unhealthy', and 'make them to be less dependent'. There is a lack of control over complex sentence structures, and punctuation is inconsistent. While simple sentences are generally understandable, the high frequency of errors in basic grammar, such as subject-verb agreement and preposition usage, limits the score.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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