Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-09-16

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

It is important for children, young adults, working people and the retired to have at least one hobby.

What's your opinion about this?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Eliminating small businesses has become increasingly common in recent years. The reason behind this is because people prefer going to supermarkets for shopping instead of visiting local vendors. This essay will examine the positive aspects of this development.

One significant reason is that huge shopping malls offer variety of food options under one roof and provide convenience. The working individual favors to purchase all at one time rather than rushing to multiple stores. For example, no frills sell numerous items such as local and international products which includes produce, milk, grains, Chinese, Italian, Indian food grains and so on are available in a major store for customers convenience. Consequently, people love to visit to save their time on grocery shopping instead of spending the whole day.

Another important point is that money-saving strategy could be one factor in visiting the massive centers while small traders would not be able to offer heavy discounts. For instance, no frills usually have point-based discounts for their customers who purchase any food items from their business and in return they can redeem those earned points in cash in exchange for their next visit once they reach certain limits. This could be a reason which enables buyers to visit often for their benefits. On the other hand, micro businesses fail to approach this strategy due to limitation of bundle buying from the manufacturer.

In conclusion, Convenience is a key factor for busy schedule pupils and to learn strategies to earn and save money while shopping.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.0

The student addresses the prompt by discussing the shift from small businesses to supermarkets, but misinterprets the core premise of the task. The prompt asks about the importance of hobbies for different age groups (children, young adults, working people, retired), yet the essay writes entirely about supermarkets versus small businesses, which is an unrelated topic. Although the ideas regarding supermarkets are developed with reasons and examples, such as 'no frills sell numerous items', the failure to address the actual prompt means the response is off-topic. According to the descriptors, this requires a lower band score due to not addressing the specified task.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

Despite being off-topic in content, the essay maintains a logical structure with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a brief conclusion. Cohesive devices such as 'One significant reason', 'Another important point', 'For example', and 'In conclusion' are used to signal the progression of ideas. However, paragraphing is somewhat undermined by the final conclusion sentence being a fragment: 'In conclusion, Convenience is a key factor for busy schedule pupils and to learn strategies to earn and save money while shopping.' Referencing and paragraph transitions show an attempt at coherence, placing it within the mid-band range.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The essay demonstrates an adequate range of vocabulary for a basic task, attempting some less common items such as 'supermarkets', 'convenience', 'micro businesses', and 'point-based discounts'. However, there are noticeable word choice and collocation errors, such as 'busy schedule pupils' instead of students or working adults, and awkward phrasings like 'The working individual favors to purchase all at one time'. Spelling is generally acceptable, but vocabulary limitations and awkward phrasing sometimes cause strain for the reader, aligning with the Band 5 descriptors.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The writer attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, such as 'The reason behind this is because people prefer...' and 'Another important point is that money-saving strategy could be one factor...'. However, grammatical accuracy is weak, with frequent errors including missing articles, awkward verb complementation ('favors to purchase'), and preposition issues ('visit to save' instead of 'visit to save'). The final sentence is grammatically incomplete and lacks a main verb clause. These recurring errors place the grammar firmly in the Band 5 category.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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