Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-05

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

It is important for children, young adults, working people and the retired to have at least one hobby.

What's your opinion about this?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Hobbies play an important role to help a person rejuvinate and get some rest from busy lifestyles and get a chance to enjoy. It is very important for children, yound adults, working people and retired people to have atleast one hobby. I would elabourate the reasons to this statement in the upcoming passages.

It is quiet important to keep the children away from mobiles phones and other electronic gadgets these days. Parents these days are both working and barely get enough time to spend with kids, so they provide phones and hope that the yound ones stay busy in the electronic devices. I believe that we should encourage children to have atleast one hobby. It could be singing, drawing or having interest in sports. If children adap a hobby at a young age their minds get developed and they build a skill of critical thinking at a young age.

Like kids and yound children it is equally important for working individuals and retired people to have a hobby. Adapting to hobby makes them a bit relaxed as most of the working class is in a race to earn more money and neglect helath and activities for personal growth. Not only this they can also have some time for family as they can do a activity all together, this in turn strengthens the relationship among family. The adults on the other hand usually spend their time sitting alone or watching television. They can adapt a hobby of morning walk and yoga to keep themselves fit and healthy.

To sum up, people of all age groups need to have a hobby as it helps all in various ways. Most importantly it keeps them busy and the mind stays busy and they are not drawn to some illegal activities.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The response addresses all parts of the task by discussing why hobbies are important for children, young adults, working people, and retired individuals, and clearly states an opinion in support of the prompt. However, some ideas are more fully developed than others. For instance, the section on children is extended with specific examples like singing, drawing, and sports, whereas the section on the retired and working population remains somewhat general, focusing broadly on stress relief and fitness without deeper exploration. The position is relevant throughout, but to move to a higher level, all demographic groups mentioned in the prompt need an equally thorough level of extension and support rather than brief over-generalisations.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The essay displays a coherent overall arrangement with a clear introduction, body paragraphs dedicated to different age groups, and a concluding summary. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate ideas. However, cohesion is sometimes mechanical and referencing can be repetitive or unclear. For example, transition phrases are basic, and expressions like 'Like kids and yound children' or 'The adults on the other hand' rely on formulaic cohesive devices rather than smooth, natural links. To achieve a higher standard, the writer should employ a wider and more flexible variety of cohesive devices and ensure that inter-sentence referencing flows more naturally without mechanical repetition.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The writer demonstrates an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, successfully communicating general ideas about hobbies, stress, and lifestyle. There are visible attempts to use less common vocabulary, such as 'rejuvinate', 'critical thinking', and 'illegal activities'. However, noticeable spelling and word-choice errors occur throughout the text, including 'rejuvinate', 'yound', 'atleast', 'elabourate', 'adap', and 'helath'. While these inaccuracies do not seriously impede communication, they restrict the vocabulary score. To reach a higher standard, the writer needs to enhance control over word forms and spelling, and incorporate more precise lexical collocations related to lifestyle and personal development.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

The response makes use of a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating attempts at subordination and relative clauses, such as 'Parents these days are both working and barely get enough time to spend with kids, so they provide phones and hope that the yound ones stay busy'. There are some errors in grammar and punctuation, including missing articles ('do a activity'), preposition misuse ('reasons to this statement'), and subject-verb agreement slips. These errors occur intermittently and rarely impede communication, reflecting a solid middle-tier control of sentence structures. To progress further, the writer should increase the frequency of error-free complex sentences and refine punctuation and prepositions.

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