Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-10

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

It is important for children, young adults, working people and the retired to have at least one hobby.

What's your opinion about this?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

It is very crucial for pupils, youngsters, working people and the retired to have at least one hobby. I strongly agree with this statement and present my opinion in the upcoming paragraphs with relevant examples.

The first and foremost reason is that having a hobby can mitigate the stress of an individual. To elucidate, people are living stressful life as they are always busy with their jobs and other purposes, so they do not have a time for themselves. Moreover, hobbies can help individuals to make time for themselves. After having a busy day, people can relieve while doing hobbies such as painting, dancing as well as listening to music. To exemplify, retired people can do their favourite hobby and make their lives more meaningful after retirement.

The another most paramount reason is that hobby can lead the successful happy career. To explicate, people are interested in some areas because of their hobbies, so they choose the careers with happiness. Consequently, it leads them successful career, as mind and heart at peace. Furthermore, hobbies can shape the person's personality and enhance the quality of life. For instance, in the countries such as Japan and China, children and other individual always having a wonderful hobby and this make their community more knowledgeable and happy.

To recapitulate, from my perspective, having a hobby is very important as it can lead the successful career and it can shape the person's personality. In addition, it can mitigate the stress of an individual and person can globalize their way of life.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

Your position is clear from the introduction: “I strongly agree,” and you give two relevant reasons—hobbies can reduce stress and may influence career choice or personal development. However, the second reason is not fully explained, and the examples about Japan and China are broad rather than showing clearly how hobbies benefit people of different ages. The conclusion also introduces “globalize their way of life,” which is unclear and not developed in the essay. The response is five words below the required 250-word minimum; the 11 words copied from the task prompt were not counted. To strengthen the response, explain each reason with a specific, relevant example and ensure the essay meets the minimum length.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The essay has a clear overall arrangement: an introduction, two body paragraphs presenting separate reasons, and a conclusion. Linking expressions such as “Moreover,” “Consequently,” and “For instance” help signal relationships between ideas. This supports a coherent progression, although some transitions feel formulaic, including “The first and foremost reason” and “To recapitulate.” Within the second body paragraph, the move from career choice to personality and then to national communities is not fully connected, so the paragraph’s focus becomes less clear. Some references, such as “this” in “this make their community,” are also difficult to follow. Use fewer stock transitions and make the connection between each example and its main point explicit.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of vocabulary for the topic, including “mitigate the stress,” “meaningful,” “personality,” and “quality of life.” These choices show an effort to use more precise or less common language, and the main ideas remain understandable. However, several expressions are inaccurate or unnatural, such as “the successful happy career,” “people can relieve,” and “globalize their way of life.” “The another most paramount reason” is also an awkward combination of words. These collocation and word-choice issues limit the naturalness of the essay, even when the intended meaning can be inferred. Aim for familiar, accurate combinations—for example, “relieve stress” and “build a successful career”—rather than adding formal-sounding words that do not fit.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and complex sentence forms, including clauses introduced by “as,” “because,” and “so,” and most sentences communicate the intended point. However, some grammatical errors remain in articles, agreement, and verb forms. Examples include “living stressful life” (missing an article), “they do not have a time” (unnecessary article), “The another…reason,” and “this make their community” (subject–verb agreement). The phrase “it leads them successful career” also lacks the grammatical structure needed after “leads.” These errors do not generally prevent understanding, but they reduce accuracy. Review article use and agreement, and check that each verb is followed by the correct pattern, such as “leads to a successful career.”

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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