Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-14

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

It is important for children, young adults, working people and the retired to have at least one hobby.

What's your opinion about this?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Nowadays, many people believe that it is important for children, young adults, working people and the retired to have at one hobby. In my opinion, i completely agree with this statement because having hobby improve your holistic health for everyone.

The main reason is that, hobby impacts on your mental health and reduce stress of daily life. This is because when individual engage in hobby they feel relax. For example, working people listens a music while doing household chores they feel more calmer and also retired people are play with children or pet help in improve their mood. Therefore, they feel relaxed in every day hustle life. consequently, quality of work will enhance when person is more calmer. So its good for all people including all ages.

Another important reason is that, hobbies can develop skills in the children. In the other words, its improves cognition area of the brain and as result increase level of creativity in the children. For instance, retired people can stay active and socialize when they are involve in the some pleasurable activities like gardening, walking with peers, doing party all these are helpful for remain mentally and physically fit. Consequently, they have good quality of mental health by enjoying hobbies and decrease chances of occurring age related dementia or alzheimer disease.

In conclusion, i strongly believe that everyone should have a hobby to stay active and for good mental well-being because hobbies are improve overall growth and development of person and eventually personality development.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

Your position is clear: you agree that people of all ages should have a hobby, and you give relevant reasons about stress, skills, socialising and mental health. Examples such as listening to music during chores and gardening help illustrate these points. However, the ideas are only partly developed: the paragraph about children’s skills shifts to retired people without explaining the connection, and several claims are asserted rather than supported. The conclusion repeats the main view but does not add much. The response also contains 235 words, so it is 15 words below the required minimum; 15 words copied from the task prompt were not counted. Develop each reason with a clearer explanation and a more directly relevant example.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, two body paragraphs and a conclusion, and the main position is easy to follow. You use linking expressions such as “For example,” “Therefore” and “In conclusion” to signal relationships between ideas. However, these links sometimes feel mechanical or do not accurately connect the points. In the second body paragraph, the topic begins with children’s skills but moves to retired people, weakening progression. The first paragraph also repeats the idea of feeling calmer and relaxed. Use clearer topic sentences, keep each paragraph focused on one reason, and make references such as “they” unambiguous. This would make the overall progression more consistent.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use relevant vocabulary for the topic, including “mental health,” “creativity,” “socialize,” “quality of work” and “age-related dementia.” These choices show an attempt to discuss both emotional and physical benefits. However, the range is limited in places, and several word combinations or forms are inaccurate, which makes some sentences less natural: “impacts on your mental health,” “feel more calmer,” and “good quality of mental health” are examples. Repetition of “hobby,” “people” and “good” also limits precision. Aim to learn common collocations and vary repeated terms, while checking spelling and word forms. More precise phrasing would help express your ideas clearly without changing their meaning.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and complex sentences, including explanations with “because” and examples introduced by “when” and “while.” This gives the response some structural variety. However, errors are frequent and sometimes make the reader work to understand the sentence. For example, “hobby improve” needs subject–verb agreement, while “working people listens” and “retired people are play” have incorrect verb forms. Articles and sentence construction are also problematic in “when individual engage in hobby” and “retired people can stay active and socialize when they are involve.” Capitalise “I,” and check agreement, articles and verb forms when editing. Building accurate short sentences before combining them will improve control.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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