Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-14

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

It is important for children, young adults, working people and the retired to have at least one hobby.

What's your opinion about this?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In the contemporary era, it is salient for children, adults, working person and retired to have at least one hobby has become a subject of considerable debate. I am firmly convinced that this is a positive development. This essay will discuss the key aspect of this issue and justfy my position.

The most signifcant point is to consider is that hobby help individuals to relax and stress free after hectic day. It is the nice way to relax physically and mentally. Additonally, they can also assit people to develop a new skills. That is the main concern. Futhermore, in children can be observed after their school they enjoyed playing games with their in streets. Another point is, they also liked watching a cartoons and it is something quite useful in everyday life. It helps children to accerating their brain development.

Alternatively, young adult have different kinds of hobbies for instance, watching films, playing sports, cooking and using social media are quite popular. Some adults enjoy hobbies alone,while others are better than shared with friends. It has boon effect on adult minds, build relationship with one another, shared daily life routine after school and tuition word. So, having a good hobby is vital for daily life.

As well as, in elderly people who are retired their jobs to have at least one hobby because they are retired and after retirement there are plethera of chance in elderly person to go to depression. So, having a hobby for elderly person makes them fit.

One basic reason is that, hobbies can make a person more valuable and strong their physically and psychlogically.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

Your position is clear in the introduction: you believe having a hobby is positive, and you give relevant reasons, including relaxation, skill development, social connection and benefits for retired people. You also refer to children, young adults and older people, so the response engages with the groups named in the prompt. However, the discussion is only partly developed. For example, the points about cartoons and children’s brain development are not clearly explained, and the claim that hobbies make people “more valuable” is vague. The essay would be stronger if each main reason were explained with a specific example and linked directly to why hobbies matter across the different age groups.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has an introduction and separate paragraphs that broadly move from children to adults and then retired people. This gives it some organisation, and signposting such as “Additionally,” “Furthermore” and “Alternatively” shows an effort to connect ideas. However, progression is not consistently clear: the second paragraph shifts between relaxation, skills, children’s games and cartoons without a clear sequence, while the final paragraph introduces another general reason after the age-group discussion. Some linking phrases are inaccurate or mechanical, and references such as “That is the main concern” do not clearly identify the point being discussed. Group related ideas into focused paragraphs and use transitions that show the actual relationship between them.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You attempt a range of topic-related vocabulary, including “hectic day,” “physically and mentally,” “develop a new skills” and “depression,” and you use some formal framing in the introduction. However, vocabulary control is limited by frequent spelling errors and awkward or inaccurate word choices, which sometimes make the intended meaning difficult to follow. Examples include “salient,” “boon effect,” “plethera of chance” and “strong their physically.” Several phrases also sound unnatural, such as “shared daily life routine.” Aim for accurate, natural collocations rather than adding formal-sounding words, and check spelling and word forms carefully. More precise vocabulary would help you explain the benefits of hobbies clearly.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including a relative clause in “children … who are retired” and a reason clause beginning “because.” However, many sentences contain errors in sentence construction, agreement, articles and verb forms, and these can make the meaning difficult to follow. For example, the opening sentence combines two structures (“it is salient … to have … has become”), while “hobby help individuals” and “young adult have” show agreement problems. The sentence beginning “Some adults enjoy hobbies alone” also has an incomplete comparison. Practise building complete sentences with one clear main clause, then check subject–verb agreement, articles and plural forms before adding extra clauses.

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