Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-16

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

It is important for children, young adults, working people and the retired to have at least one hobby.

What's your opinion about this?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Having one hobby, for anyone can be a long debatable topic, as if we see working people and retired people can face alot of issues in to have at least one hobby for themself.

Being passionate about one thing can be really nice, as you can acvhive alot of your goals and even help you improve your lifestyle. People at work place can have a hobby to workout after office which can help them out in staying active at workplace, moreover it will help them to aviod some of the backpain which occur due to the 9 to 5 routine. Moreover young adults and kids who have hobbies make them stay focused on their goals in the longer run, for example I love to play vollyball since childhood till now, and it made me learn alot of thing like team work, staying put. People who have retired can work on something which really excites them as in an old age it would make them stay active and healthy.

But however having these hobby can be sometimes be turn into a nagtive thing, especially in young adults and children whom cant achive something which they want in there favourite hobby, might result in having bad attuide. For working people it is very hard as there minds are always stuck in 9 to 5 job routine due to which they get exchausted, and cannot have a hobby which might even make them furstated.

If we see all of the above points having hobby is great thing but in my opinion working and retired people wont get that time for fullfilling their hobbies as they wont be getting anytime or will be mentally exchatused doing work for this much time and this work rotuine wont allow them to do anything other then having rest or spending time with there family.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You give a relevant, generally positive view of hobbies and support it with examples involving workers, young people, children and retirees. The volleyball example adds a personal reason, and you also acknowledge possible drawbacks, so the response engages with the question. However, your position becomes unclear in the conclusion: you say hobbies are “a great thing,” but then argue that working and retired people “won’t get that time,” without clearly stating whether you still believe everyone should have one. Several points are asserted rather than explained, such as how hobbies help young people stay focused or why a hobby might create a “bad attitude.” State your opinion consistently and develop fewer points with clearer explanations or examples.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has an identifiable structure: it introduces the topic, presents benefits, considers disadvantages, and ends with a conclusion. Examples such as the workplace exercise and your volleyball experience help readers follow the main ideas. However, progression is uneven, and the final paragraph introduces a conflicting view rather than clearly resolving the discussion. Linking words are sometimes repetitive or awkwardly used: “Moreover” appears several times, while “But however” combines two contrasting signals. Some references are also unclear, including “these hobby” and “this work routine,” which make it harder to track the ideas. Use clearer topic sentences, organise each paragraph around one main point, and connect the conclusion directly to your stated opinion.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You attempt vocabulary relevant to the topic, including “passionate,” “active,” “focused,” and “exhausted,” and you use examples to express benefits and drawbacks. However, the range is limited and several word-choice, collocation, and spelling errors make parts of the response difficult to read. Examples include “achvieve,” “vollyball,” “bad attuide,” and “fullfilling”; phrases such as “staying active at workplace” and “staying put” do not express your intended meaning naturally. Repetition of “hobby,” “work,” and “time” also limits precision. Build a bank of accurate topic phrases, check spelling carefully, and choose expressions that convey the specific benefit or problem you mean.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and longer sentences, including explanations with “which” and examples introduced by “for example.” However, complex sentences are often faulty, and frequent errors in sentence structure, agreement, articles, and verb forms sometimes make the meaning difficult to follow. For instance, “Having one hobby, for anyone can be a long debatable topic” has an unclear structure, while “young adults and kids who have hobbies make them stay focused” does not form a clear grammatical relationship. There are also errors in “these hobby can be” and “people who have retired can work on something which really excites them as in an old age.” Practise building accurate sentences first, then add subordinate clauses and check agreement and punctuation.

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