Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-16

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

It is important for children, young adults, working people and the retired to have at least one hobby.

What's your opinion about this?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Hobby is a personal interest of a person. Some people think that it is very important to have at least one hobby for children, youngsters, working professionals and the retired person. I totally agree with this statement. In this essay I will discuss the reasons for my agreement with examples.

First of all, it is important to remain happy in a life. In simple words, hobby is a way for everyone to take a break from their daily activities, which provide a sense of happiness. For example, when people get bored in their life hobby can provide them to feel positive vibe in their routine life.

Secondly, people can focus on their work or study easily. In other words, personal interest play a crucial roll to remain focused in daily activity as people spend sometime in doing what they actually enjoy to do which works as stress breaker. For instance, I personally likes to listen music whenever I feel stressed and then I am able to focus on my work.

Thirdly, hobby is necessary for a personal growth. To simplify, many people try to start their career in their own interested field, which provide them a platform to develop their hobby into personal growth.

In conclusion, I firmly believe that hobby is very important for all aged people to remain happy, to improve focus in daily activities and for personal development are the main three reasons for my opinion. Different people have different hobby and I think all type of hobby has their own unique benefit for a person.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

Your position is clear from the introduction (“I totally agree”) and remains consistent in the conclusion. You give three relevant reasons—happiness, improved focus, and personal growth—and the example about listening to music helps illustrate the second point. This addresses the task, but the ideas are not developed equally: happiness and focus receive brief explanations, while personal growth is especially unclear. For example, explain how a hobby can build skills or lead to a career, and add a specific illustration. The claim that hobbies benefit “all aged people” could also be connected more directly to children, working adults, and retired people, rather than treating them as one group. More explanation and support would make the response more complete.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, three reason-based body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Sequencing phrases such as “First of all,” “Secondly,” and “Thirdly” make the progression easy to follow, and examples are placed alongside the relevant points. This meets the lower-band expectations securely and shows some features of stronger organisation. However, the linking can feel mechanical because each paragraph follows the same signposted pattern, and some connections are unclear. In the first body paragraph, for instance, the move from boredom to a “positive vibe” is not fully explained. The conclusion also repeats the three reasons rather than drawing them together. Use more varied transitions and make the relationship between each claim and its explanation explicit.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use enough vocabulary to communicate the main ideas, including topic-related expressions such as “personal interest,” “daily activities,” “stress breaker,” and “personal development.” There are also attempts to express ideas in different ways, for example “To simplify” and “In other words.” However, word choice and collocation are often inaccurate or unnatural, which limits precision: “provide them to feel positive vibe,” “personal interest play a crucial roll,” and “in their own interested field” are difficult or awkward formulations. Some wording is also repetitive, particularly “hobby” and “important.” Aim to learn common word partnerships and check word forms and spelling. More natural phrasing would help your ideas sound clearer and more fluent without requiring unusually advanced vocabulary.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You use both simple sentences and some longer structures, including a relative clause in “a way for everyone to take a break …, which provide a sense of happiness” and a subordinate clause beginning “whenever I feel stressed.” The overall meaning is generally understandable, but some grammatical errors remain. For example, “which provide” does not agree with the singular noun “a way,” and “personal interest play” needs a plural subject or a singular verb. There are also errors in “I personally likes” and “all type of hobby.” Articles and sentence construction need attention as well, particularly in “remain happy in a life.” Practise subject–verb agreement, singular and plural forms, and article use, then proofread each sentence while keeping the range of structures you are attempting.

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