Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-16

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

It is important for children, young adults, working people and the retired to have at least one hobby.

What's your opinion about this?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In this prevailing era, doing any kind of hoppy plays an important role in everyone's life. Therefore, it is essential for every age group such as elders, youngsters, offspring and working individuals at least a hobby so that they can enjoy that hoppy in order to feel relaxed. I agree with that, I think everyone should have one skill or hobby which is beneficial for them. There are a plethora of reasons behind this opinion, which I will discuss in the upcoming paragraphs.

Commencing with the most salient reason why everyone should have a atleast one hobby it works as a skill or help for the future. Children can do swimming or play any game in order to get relax from their every day stress or studies. For example, If children have a hobby to do swimming, this is not only good for their health but also they can choose this skill as their future job or take participate in sports. As a result, they can earn name and fame in the society. Moreover, these days, working masses have a hectic schedule, they do not have a time to go outside for gym or outdoor games. Consequently, every time stress and no excercise put deterimental effects not only physical health but also mental health. Therefore, If working people have a at least a one hobby such as cooking or gardening, they feel more refresh and engertic after doing that, gardening is a good way connect with nature.

Furtheremore, nowadays elders or retired citizens feel isolated by dint of nuclear family system or young people are busy in their study and work. As a result they elders people feel alone, therefore if retired masses have a any hobby they can indulge themselves in it, and spend their time by doing their hobby. This hoppy can be gardening, yoga, exercise, painting, listen music and so on. Moreover, young peple also choose a hobby in order to stay fit and healthy. They can choose such as, cooking, singing, painting, art and craft, reading books and so on. These all hobbies will help to get something which is really vital for their future.

In conclusions, I believe everyone should do hobby so that they choose whenever they feel bore and as a future job.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

Your position is clear: you agree that people of all ages should have a hobby, and you address children, working adults, retired people and young people. Relevant reasons include relaxation, health, future opportunities and reducing isolation. The swimming example gives some support by showing how a hobby could benefit a child beyond leisure. However, several points are asserted rather than explained: for instance, the claim that hobbies help people “get something which is really vital for their future” is vague, and the benefits for young people are mostly listed. Develop fewer ideas more fully, and explain how hobbies specifically help each group. This would make the response more consistently developed and persuasive.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, two body paragraphs organised around different age groups, and a conclusion. Linking expressions such as “Moreover,” “As a result” and “Therefore” help show relationships between ideas. However, some transitions feel mechanical or do not clearly connect the claims, and the third paragraph moves from retired people to young people without a strong link. There is also unclear referencing in “As a result they elders people feel alone,” which makes the sentence harder to follow. Use fewer formulaic connectors, make each paragraph focus on a clear central idea, and use pronouns or repeated nouns precisely so readers can track who each point concerns.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a reasonable range of topic vocabulary, including “isolated,” “hectic schedule,” “nuclear family system” and “physical health,” and you attempt more formal expressions such as “salient reason.” These choices show ambition, but several are inaccurate, awkward or misspelled, which limits precision: “hoppy” is repeated, “working masses” sounds unnatural, and “engertic” and “deterimental” are misspelled. Some phrases, including “earn name and fame” and “get relax,” also do not sound natural in context. Aim for accurate, natural collocations rather than ornate wording. Proofread spelling and choose vocabulary that expresses the intended meaning directly.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and complex sentences, including conditional structures such as “if retired masses have a any hobby they can indulge themselves in it” and cause-and-effect clauses. Meaning is generally understandable, but errors in articles, agreement, verb patterns and sentence boundaries occur across the response. For example, “everyone should have one skill or hobby which is beneficial for them” has an agreement mismatch, while “they do not have a time” uses an unnecessary article. The sentence beginning “Moreover, these days, working masses…” also joins clauses with a comma where stronger punctuation or a conjunction is needed. Practise checking articles and subject–verb agreement, and revise long sentences into clearly connected clauses.

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