Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-18

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

It is important for children, young adults, working people and the retired to have at least one hobby.

What's your opinion about this?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In todays busy world people of all ages have diffrent responsibilities. such as a studying working and taking care of their families. in my opinion having one hobby is very important for children young adults working people and retired individulals becuase it hrlps them reduce stress improve their skills and enjoy their iives.

firstly hobbies are beneficeal for mental and physical health. many people experince stress becuase of their studies jobs or family responsibilites. its is usefull for relax and refresh their mind. foe example working people can go for walk listen to music or play sports afterva long day work. it\\these activites can imrove their mood and help them to healthy lifestyle.

secondly hobbies help people to develope new skill and build confidance .children can learn creativiety through drawing painting and playing musical instruments. similarly young adults can improve their communicatin skills and teamworks skills vy joing spots or social clubs. so that skilss also helpfull for them in education and future careers. for instance improve their voccablary and writing abilitys.

furthermore hobbies are eqully importanc for retierd people . after retuirment some individuals are feel so lonely or bored becuse they have no longer haveregular job. so if they have activivties like gardanig cooking or volunteeing can give them a sense help them stay socially avtive.

hoveever pepole chosse hobbies according to their intrest avaibilty time ond finacial situation. simple activities like reading book exercising or time spent in nature its gret benift for them.

in sum up i strongly belive that everyone should at least one hobby regardless of their diffrent afe afe group. hobbies improve mental well being develope usefull skills and make life more enjoyeble.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

Your position is clear from the introduction and conclusion: you strongly support everyone having a hobby. You address several groups and give relevant reasons, including stress relief, skill development, and social connection for retired people. Examples such as playing sports, learning an instrument, and volunteering help make the response relevant. This meets the task well, while the range of ideas shows some of the fuller development expected at the next level. However, some points are only briefly explained: the final example about vocabulary and writing is not clearly connected to a particular hobby, and the benefits for working people could be developed further. Explain how an example demonstrates your claim, rather than listing activities alone.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable overall structure: an introduction, separate paragraphs for benefits, and a concluding opinion. Sequencing words such as “firstly,” “secondly,” and “furthermore” help readers follow the main points. However, cohesion is sometimes mechanical, and some links between ideas are unclear. For example, “so that skilss also helpfull for them” does not clearly show how the skills relate to education and careers, while the vocabulary-and-writing example appears abruptly. The paragraph beginning “however” also introduces a qualification without explaining how it connects to the argument. Use clearer references and transitions, and organise each paragraph around one developed point with an example that directly supports it.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use a relevant range of topic vocabulary, including “responsibilities,” “mental and physical health,” “confidence,” and “socially active.” These choices show an effort to discuss the topic beyond very basic terms. However, spelling errors and inaccurate word forms are frequent and sometimes make the reader pause, as in “diffrent,” “beneficeal,” “retierd,” and “communicatin.” Some combinations are also unnatural or unclear, such as “give them a sense” and “time spent in nature its gret benift.” Check spelling carefully and learn common collocations as complete phrases. More accurate choices such as “a sense of purpose” and “maintain a healthy lifestyle” would make your ideas clearer and more natural.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple statements and longer sentences, including clauses introduced by “because” and “if,” so there is some variety in structure. The main message is generally understandable, but grammatical errors are frequent and can make individual sentences difficult to follow. For example, “its is usefull for relax” has an unclear subject and faulty verb pattern, while “if they have activivties … can give them” lacks a clear grammatical subject for “can give.” There are also problems with sentence boundaries and punctuation, such as starting “such as” as a separate sentence and inconsistent capitalisation. Practise building complete sentences with clear subjects and verbs, and check articles, agreement, and punctuation during revision.

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