Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-19

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

It is important for children, young adults, working people and the retired to have at least one hobby.

What's your opinion about this?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

We are all human being have different genetic makeup with same or different qualities.All human being have the right to spend a balance healthy life without any disability and disease,free from stress and anxiety and full of happiness, no matter who are , either children,yungs or retired and working people.Wther are how much busy in our lives and soing siffrent taak to fullfill our necessities but we all have a hobby that make us unique from one an other.acvording to agw group every individual habe thiwr onw hobby this hobby could be a genetic transfer habit or an adopted habit bit hoby are considered a meal of mind it gives a a Sense of happiness, provide strengthen ans make you busy.Due to work load and long work hours qe always get fadeup from our same routine and performance. however every person has their own hobby according his/hwr interest,like watching tv,computer games,kneeting,sinnging, etc. Children has their own hobbies as per their age demands and that hobbies are helpful in their growth and development,likely retired person hobbies are important to keep them busy so that they could not feel loneliness.For women the moat famous hobby is cooking,majority women like cooking and home decoring.If hobbies promote and support by government it could be a part vof valuable incomes and retired person could independent in their earnings and burden of government will reduce. for example those women are Keen in cooking they can run a hotel business or home meal and supply it in hostels.my idea could provide a future value

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You express a generally positive view of hobbies and connect them to happiness, personal interests, children’s development, and older people’s wellbeing. The examples of cooking and possible food businesses also show an attempt to support your opinion. However, your position is not stated clearly and consistently: the opening focuses on everyone’s right to a healthy life, while the response does not directly explain why each group, including working people and young adults, should have a hobby. Several claims, such as hobbies being genetically transferred or reducing the government’s burden, are unclear or insufficiently explained. To strengthen the response, state your opinion directly at the beginning, then develop a few relevant reasons with specific examples for different age groups.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

There is some relevant progression from the general value of hobbies to examples involving children, retired people, and cooking. However, the ideas are presented as one long block, with no clear paragraph structure, so the reader has difficulty seeing the main points and how they relate. Connections such as “however” and “for example” are attempted, but “however” does not clearly signal a contrast, and the final example leads abruptly to “my idea could provide a future value.” Some references, including “that hobbies” and “this hobby,” are also difficult to follow. Organise the response into an introduction, separate body paragraphs for reasons and examples, and a conclusion; use linking phrases only where the relationship between ideas is clear.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You attempt a range of topic-related vocabulary, including “stress and anxiety,” “growth and development,” “work load,” and “loneliness,” and you give examples of hobbies such as cooking and singing. This shows some ability to discuss the topic beyond very basic terms. However, frequent spelling errors and inaccurate or unnatural word choices make parts difficult to understand, for example “meal of mind,” “genetic transfer habit,” and “future value.” Several expressions are also repeated, particularly “hobby” and “person.” Aim for accurate, natural collocations and check spelling carefully. More precise phrases such as “a source of mental stimulation” and “relieve the pressure of a routine” would help communicate your ideas clearly.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You attempt to combine ideas using longer sentences and clauses, for example when explaining how hobbies may help retired people avoid loneliness. However, these attempts are often difficult to follow because of frequent problems with sentence boundaries, agreement, articles, and verb forms. Examples include “Children has their own hobbies,” “hobbies are important to keep them busy so that they could not feel loneliness,” and the run-on opening sentence. Punctuation and spacing are also inconsistent, making sentence structure harder to identify. Practise writing shorter, complete sentences first, checking that each has a clear subject and verb; then add subordinate clauses carefully. Review subject–verb agreement and article use before attempting longer sentences.

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