Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-20

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

It is important for children, young adults, working people and the retired to have at least one hobby.

What's your opinion about this?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Nowadays, hobbies play a vital part in everyone's life.Many people believe that it is necessary for individuals including all ages to have at least one hobby because it will help to get relaxed, calm and refresh mind. The essay will discuss the importance of having atleast one hobby in our lives.

To begin with, people who have their one preference about spending their leisure time will help them to stay focus and relax.This states that, people feels happy when they spend their time with their one of the favourite activities which leads to refresh their mind. A clear example can be seen mostly children focus more on studies after break time because their feel refresh after playing.As a result, people who owns hobby can improve their productivity because hobby helps to reduce stress and feels more focused.

However, people without hobby feel alone and depress in their free time because it is difficult to use the free time. This means that, if people do not have specific preference for leisure time, they feel alone and may cause depression. For example, after retirement many people may feels depress due to loneliness. As a result, it is important to have atleast one hobby for spending the time and feels happy.

To conclude, I firmly believe that all individuals obtain one hooby for reduce stress and improve productivity. Although, excessive time can creates problem, there are several benefits of owning a particular activity. People should feel good when they spend their time with their favourite activity.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

Your position is clear: you agree that everyone should have a hobby, and you give relevant reasons, including relaxation, improved focus and the risk of loneliness after retirement. The examples about children returning to their studies after playing and retired people feeling lonely help connect your ideas to different age groups. This addresses the task, but some points are more fully explained than others. The productivity point is repeated without showing in detail how hobbies improve it, and the retirement example is brief. The sentence about “excessive time” also introduces a possible drawback that is not explained. Develop each main reason with a clearer explanation or specific example, and make sure the conclusion reflects the argument consistently.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, two body paragraphs presenting benefits and a conclusion. Sequencing phrases such as “To begin with,” “However,” and “To conclude” make the progression easy to follow, and the second body paragraph provides a contrast with the first. This organisation is effective, while some cohesion remains mechanical or unclear. For example, “This states that” and “This means that” repeat the preceding claim rather than extending it, and “people who have their one preference” makes the reference difficult to follow. Some ideas also recur, particularly feeling relaxed, happy and refreshed. Use pronouns and linking phrases more precisely, and connect each example directly to the point it supports to make the progression smoother.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use a relevant range of topic vocabulary, including “leisure time,” “preference,” “productivity,” “stress,” and “loneliness,” so the main ideas are generally understandable. However, the range is limited and several word-choice, collocation and word-form errors make the writing sound unnatural. Examples include “get relaxed,” “refresh mind,” “people who owns hobby,” and “feel alone and depress.” Spelling errors such as “hooby” and “atleast” also reduce accuracy. Aim to learn common word partnerships and check word forms and spelling during revision. More precise expressions would help you explain the benefits of hobbies without relying repeatedly on “feel” and “time.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and complex sentence forms, including clauses with “because” and “when,” and the reader can usually understand your main points. However, control is inconsistent, especially in subject–verb agreement, verb forms, articles and sentence boundaries. For instance, “people feels happy” should use a plural verb, while “their feel refresh” has an incorrect pronoun and verb construction. In “after retirement many people may feels,” the modal should be followed by the base form. There are also missing spaces after full stops and commas, as in “life.Many” and “relax.This.” Practise checking agreement and verb patterns, and proofread punctuation. More accurate complex sentences would make your reasoning clearer.

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