Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-20

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

It is important for children, young adults, working people and the retired to have at least one hobby.

What's your opinion about this?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

An idea has been sparked that it is very important for the folks of all age groups to have at least some king of activity that really appeals to them. Under my perspective, this idea is indeed rational and I will substantiate my views in the upcoming crumb of my writing.

Considering the brighter side, teenagers and adults needs to have couple of hobbies in their life. It is very fruitful for their positive energy and enjoying their life to the fullest. As an instance, my niece is eight year old. She really likes to play cricket. It can be very useful in her later life as she can pursue her career in cricket and can go to many olympics and play overseas. It can give her an opportunity to become famous athlete in the future. If children have hobby in their early age, it can give them chance to recognise their talent and their goal in life.

To add further credence to my assertion, in this millenium era, almost evryone is following hectic schedules and are struggling to get free time or give time to their seniors. It can lead to their aggressive behaviour which can further lead to many health and mental problems. It is highly recommended that they should engage themselves in the activity they are interested in. Foe example,When people get retired, they really find their life to be boring as they were used to work and busy environment. If they have any kind of hobby, they can keep themselves busy and can enjoy the precious moments of their life happily.

Epitomisingly, I believe that every people should engage themselves some leisure time so that they can pursue whatever they likes. It can give them purpose to live their life happily and smile.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

Your position is clear: you agree that people of all ages benefit from having a hobby, and you give relevant reasons about discovering children’s talents and helping retired people enjoy their time. The examples of your niece playing cricket and retirees needing an engaging activity support the main argument. However, the task names children, young adults, working people and retired people, while your discussion focuses mainly on children and retirees; the benefits for young adults and working people are only briefly implied. Some claims, such as the possibility of a child becoming famous or competing in the Olympics, are not fully explained. Develop each age group’s benefits more evenly and connect examples directly to your reasons.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, two body paragraphs presenting reasons, and a concluding statement. Linking phrases such as “Considering the brighter side” and “To add further credence” signal the movement between points, and the examples generally follow the ideas they illustrate. However, some transitions sound formulaic, and the progression within paragraphs is not always smooth. For example, the first body paragraph moves from positive energy to a possible cricket career and then to recognising talent without clearly explaining how these points connect. The conclusion also introduces “leisure time” rather than neatly summarising the two main reasons. Use simpler, more natural links and make each paragraph develop one central point in a clear sequence.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You attempt a range of vocabulary, including “substantiate,” “credence,” “hectic schedules” and “aggressive behaviour,” and the overall meaning is usually understandable. However, several choices are unnatural or inaccurate for this topic, such as “upcoming crumb of my writing,” “some king of activity,” and “Epitomisingly.” There are also spelling errors, including “millenium,” “evryone” and “Foe,” which reduce accuracy. Some phrases, such as “precious moments of their life happily,” are awkwardly combined. Aim for precise, natural collocations rather than overly formal expressions; for example, say that hobbies “provide enjoyment” or “help people stay active.” Proofreading spelling and word forms would also improve clarity.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You use both simple and more complex sentence forms, including conditional structures such as “If children have hobby in their early age, it can give them chance…” and clauses explaining consequences. Most ideas remain understandable, but some grammatical errors occur across the response. Examples include subject–verb agreement in “teenagers and adults needs,” missing articles in “have couple of hobbies” and “my niece is eight year old,” and incorrect agreement in “every people should engage themselves.” The final clause “whatever they likes” also has a subject–verb error. Review agreement, articles and plural forms, and check that each sentence has a clear, grammatically consistent subject. More accurate control of these patterns would make your varied sentences easier to follow.

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