Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-28
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
It is important for children, young adults, working people and the retired to have at least one hobby.
What's your opinion about this?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
Age has nothing to do with hobbies. It is crucial for children, working people and retired ones to have atleast one hobby. I agree with this notion. This essay will discuss my opinion along with relevant examples.
To commence with, there are numerous positive points of having hobbbies. If talk about children, nowadays, in this competitive era, they give full attention to studies. Sometimes, because of burden they become depressed. So, their favourite hobby would help them to feel relax. Moreover, teenage could also persue career in their favourite activity. For instance, some people have games related hobbies. They like to play football or cricket. If they continue it then they can build career in this field. To add to it, if talk about working people, they have a hectic life. Their favourite hobby act as a weapon to break monotony. It act as a booster. They feel more relaxed after doing their favourite thing. For illustration, I personaaly like to listen to music after my eight hour shift to feel relax.
Furthermore, if talk about retired people, they spend their most of time by sitting or sleeping. So, if they have a hobby then they would like to spend their time on it and would feel active and productive throughout the day. For instance, it is often seen that many old people love to do kniting in their free time. By doing these small movemets they do not suffer from joint problems. What is more, nowadays people prefer to live in a nuclear family. They do not want to live with grandparents.So, their favourite activity will keep them busy and they will not feel bored.
In my opnion, everyone should have atleast one hobby to feel calm and relaxed in life.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5
Your position is clear from the introduction and conclusion: you agree that people of all ages should have a hobby. You address children, working adults and retired people, and support your points with relevant examples, such as listening to music after a shift and older people knitting. This covers the task well. However, the groups are not developed equally: the point about children becoming depressed is asserted rather than explained, and the career example focuses on teenagers, a group not explicitly named in the prompt. The claim that knitting prevents joint problems also needs qualification or support. To strengthen the response, explain more precisely how hobbies benefit each age group and ensure examples directly support those explanations.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5
The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, separate paragraphs for different age groups, and a concluding opinion. The sequence from children to working people and then retired people is easy to follow, and examples generally appear beside the points they illustrate. Cohesive phrases such as “Moreover,” “Furthermore,” and “For instance” help signal relationships between ideas. At times, however, the linking becomes mechanical through repeated openings such as “if talk about,” “So,” and “For instance.” Some references are also unclear, as in “By doing these small movements,” where the activity being referred to could be stated more directly. Use a wider range of transitions and connect each example explicitly to the point it supports.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.5
You use a relevant range of vocabulary, including “competitive era,” “burden,” “monotony,” and “productive,” which helps communicate the benefits of hobbies. Some less common expressions are attempted, but several choices are unnatural or imprecise, such as “their favourite hobby act as a weapon,” “feel relax,” and “teenage could also pursue career.” Repetition of “favourite” and “hobby” also limits flexibility. Spelling errors, including “hobbbies,” “personaaly,” “kniting,” and “movemets,” are noticeable and reduce accuracy. Aim for natural collocations and check spelling carefully; for example, describe a hobby as “a way to relieve stress” rather than a “weapon,” and say that someone “feels relaxed.”
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5
You attempt a mix of simple and complex sentences, using clauses with “if,” “because,” and “after,” as well as examples introduced with “which.” Most of the meaning remains clear, but some recurring grammatical errors affect accuracy. For example, “If talk about children” lacks a subject and verb, while “Their favourite hobby act” and “It act” have subject–verb agreement errors. There are also problems with articles and sentence construction in “teenage could also pursue career” and “they spend their most of time.” To improve, practise complete conditional or introductory clauses, check agreement between subjects and verbs, and review article use. More consistently accurate complex sentences would make your ideas easier to read.
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