Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-31

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

It is important for children, young adults, working people and the retired to have at least one hobby.

What's your opinion about this?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

It is true that hobbies are more necessary for every person so it does not matter if person either young or older. I think hobbies are an essential to get away from stress.

To begin with, there are several reasons why atleast one hobby is important for evryone. From the perspective of children, if children have hobbies, it would more beneficial for their growth because they would do effort to do it. For instance, when children love to play football, they play this game with friend, they have need to play game in team as a result, they can learn important skills such as team work, communication and time management akong with leadership as well as learn discipline. Apart from it, these days, teenagers face a lot of stress in their lives due to more competition in study and work that is why they have need to hard work so they suffer from anxiety and depression. Therefore, if they have hobby, they can do it when they feel stress which assists them to feel mind fresh as a result, they would more attention on their work which would more beneficial for their productivity.

Moreover, older people feel loneliness at home because their family members go for work so they are alone at home as a consequence they feel stress and depression so if they have hobby, they can spend time with it which helps them to make more energetic. For instane, if they love listen music and gardening which activities would keep them busy in our lives so they would not overthinking which would more fruitfull to away from stress.

To conclude, hobbies are more crucial in person lives to away from stress and enjoy their lives. Therefore age is does not matter for hobbies.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

Your position is clear: you agree that hobbies matter at every age and explain that they help people manage stress. The response addresses children, teenagers and older people, with relevant examples such as football, music and gardening. The explanation of children’s social skills is the most developed, while the points about teenagers’ productivity and older people’s wellbeing are less fully explained. The task also mentions working people, but this group is not discussed separately, so coverage is not quite complete. To strengthen the response, develop each age group with a specific explanation or example and make the link between the hobby and its benefits more precise.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The essay has a clear overall structure: an introduction, two body paragraphs and a conclusion. Ideas generally progress from children and teenagers to older people, and linking expressions such as “To begin with,” “Moreover” and “To conclude” help signal this movement. However, cohesion is sometimes mechanical because several sentences rely on repeated “so,” “therefore” and “as a result.” Some sentences also contain too many connected ideas, making relationships less clear—for example, the sentence about teenagers’ stress and productivity. Use a wider range of linking methods, including pronouns and shorter sentences, and ensure each sentence develops one main point. This would make the progression smoother and referencing clearer.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use relevant vocabulary for the topic, including “anxiety,” “depression,” “communication,” “leadership” and “productivity,” and these choices help convey your main ideas. There is also some attempt to use less common expressions, such as “time management.” However, word choice and collocation are often inaccurate or repetitive: “more necessary,” “feel mind fresh,” “make more energetic” and “fruitfull to away from stress” are not natural formulations. Spelling errors such as “evryone,” “instane” and “akong” also reduce accuracy. Build a bank of natural phrases for discussing benefits, such as “relieve stress” and “develop social skills,” and check spelling and word forms during revision.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and complex sentences, including conditional structures such as “if children have hobbies” and cause-and-effect clauses. This shows some range, but complex sentences are often faulty, and errors occur across the response. Examples include “it would more beneficial,” “they have need to hard work,” “they would more attention,” and “age is does not matter.” Articles, verb forms and sentence construction also need attention, as in “if they love listen music and gardening.” These errors sometimes make the reader work to understand the intended meaning. Practise forming complete clauses with accurate auxiliaries and verb patterns, and break long sentences into shorter units before checking agreement, articles and punctuation.

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