Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-11-03

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

It is important for children, young adults, working people and the retired to have at least one hobby.

What's your opinion about this?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Hobbies drive our inner passion and is the way to relieve stress, making life enjoyable.It is certainly believed that its atmost essential for people to all the age groups to have atleast one hobby which keeps them motivated. I certainly agree this to be true as hobbies play role of giving nutrition to brain essential to function healthy both physically and psychologically.

For elderly population , this hobbies like gardening , playing some musical instruments or reading actually plays a vital role in giving their mind a direction to work on and remain creative. For this tender age often being home with no major resposibilties in terms of job , studies or targets they find it hard to find a purpose and often develop loneliness these hobbies often keep them engaged with activity , removing their anxiety and stress from overthinking which is most commanly observed in this age. Moreover,hobbies

Secondly for young adults these hobbies can turn to be best career choice , giving them a reason to persue it for all of their life. It would be give them sense of fullfilment if they excell in field they are passionate about. For example, a college student who has a passion for singing can professionally choose singing as his career which benefits him financially along with persuing his interests. Furthermore for working population and young adults hobbies shape their minds and

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

Your position is clear: you agree that people of different ages should have a hobby, and you give relevant reasons, including stress relief, creativity and the possibility of turning a passion into a career. The examples of gardening, music and a student choosing singing help connect the discussion to the topic. However, the response addresses the task only partially: the discussion focuses mainly on older people and young adults, while working people and children are not meaningfully covered, and the final point about working people is left unfinished. Several claims, such as hobbies providing “nutrition to brain,” are not explained clearly. The response is also 18 words below the required minimum. Develop each age group with a specific reason or example and complete the argument and conclusion.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

There is some organisation: the opening states your opinion, and the next paragraph discusses older people before “Secondly” introduces young adults. This gives the reader a basic sense of direction. However, progression is interrupted by incomplete ideas, especially the paragraph ending “Moreover, hobbies” and the final sentence ending “hobbies shape their minds and”. These fragments leave relationships between points unclear and make the response feel unfinished. Linking phrases such as “For example” and “Furthermore” are attempted, but they do not compensate for the missing development or a conclusion. Use a separate paragraph for each main age group, connect each reason to its example, and finish with a brief summary of your position.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You attempt a range of topic-related vocabulary, including “relieve stress,” “creative,” “loneliness,” “anxiety,” and “sense of fulfilment.” These choices show an effort to discuss both emotional benefits and career possibilities. However, spelling errors and awkward or inaccurate collocations are noticeable, for example “atmost essential,” “persue,” “fullfilment,” and “nutrition to brain.” Some phrases also make the intended meaning less clear, such as “this tender age” for older people. Aim for accurate, natural combinations and check spelling carefully; for instance, hobbies can “stimulate the mind” rather than provide “nutrition to brain.” More precise vocabulary would help express your relevant ideas without requiring the reader to infer your meaning.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple statements and longer sentences with reasons, such as the sentence explaining that hobbies can reduce anxiety and stress. However, control is inconsistent, and errors in agreement, articles, sentence boundaries and verb forms sometimes make the writing difficult to follow. For example, “Hobbies drive our inner passion and is” has a subject–verb agreement problem, while “It is certainly believed that its atmost essential” is not a complete, correctly formed construction. The long sentence beginning “For this tender age” also lacks clear punctuation and structure, and the final clauses are incomplete. Practise building complete sentences with a clear subject and verb, then check agreement and punctuation. Shorter, accurate sentences would make your ideas easier to understand.

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