Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-09-13

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Write about the following topic:

In many countries, family members work together in their family business.

Do you think family businesses have more advantages than disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.5)

Some people believe that working in an organisation where its members are related by blood has more merits than demerits. While others argue the opposite. This essay will examine both points of view and I will give my standpoint.

Working in a family owned company is beneficial because the cost of paying an employee will be downsized. This will help the family to consolidate their wealth and the money will only circulate within the family and amount meant to cover for staff expenses will be channelled to other responsibilities within the family. Again, family members will protect their business as no outsider will embezzle the family's collective wealth. For example, a businessman who imports goods from China will feel more comfortable when his brothers are in charge of his business while he's away. This is because he trusts them unlike when an outsider works for him.

On the other hand, it is a dangerous move to have only family members working in the same business. This is because there will be unhealthy competition amongst them. Moreso, the businessman may not want to annoy his brothers because they already know too much about him and his business and they may arrange with hoodlums to set the factory/ business ablaze only because there was a disagreement amongst them.

In as much as we want to include family members into our business, opportunity should also be given to those who apply and qualify for the job. By so doing, more jobs are created and the poverty gap in the society will gradually be closed. Again, wealth will be evenly distributed and not concentrated in one family thereby making the rich to be more richer. In addition, outsiders will have the opportunity to learn the business. Unlike family members, outsiders will not be bold enough to cause harm to the business.

In conclusion, working together united the family but the rivalry involved is more disadvantageous than the benefits. Family members should venture into other areas because issues that involves money most times, divides the family beyond reconciliation.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The response addresses all parts of the task by discussing both advantages and disadvantages of family businesses, presenting a clear position throughout. The introduction outlines the essay's structure, and main body paragraphs explore specific points such as cost reduction, trust, unhealthy competition, and the broader societal impacts of hiring outsiders. Ideas are generally extended and supported with examples, such as an importer trusting his brothers over an outsider. However, some arguments edge towards over-generalisation or extreme scenarios, such as employees arranging for hoodlums to burn down a business over a dispute, which slightly limits the depth of professional task development. Nevertheless, the position is well-maintained and all prompt requirements are fulfilled.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.0

The essay displays a clear logical organisation and progression throughout. Information and ideas are arranged coherently with standard discourse markers and cohesive devices used to guide the reader, such as 'While others argue the opposite', 'Working in a family owned company is beneficial because...', 'On the other hand', and 'In conclusion'. Paragraphing is used sufficiently and appropriately, with distinct paragraphs dedicated to the introduction, the advantages, the disadvantages, a broader societal perspective, and a concluding summary. Referencing is generally clear, though occasional transitional transitions feel somewhat mechanical, keeping the cohesion at a solid functional level.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The writer demonstrates an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, attempting less common items and phrasing such as 'consolidate their wealth', 'collective wealth', and 'evenly distributed'. There are some word-choice and collocation inaccuracies, such as 'downsized' used to mean reduced or lowered (rather than staff reduction), 'making the rich to be more richer' (grammatical error in collocation), and 'issues that involves money'. However, these lexical errors do not impede communication, and the vocabulary used is sufficient to convey the intended meaning adequately.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The essay employs a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating control over relative clauses and conditional-like structures, as seen in 'A businessman who imports goods from China will feel more comfortable when his brothers are in charge'. There are some noticeable errors in grammar and punctuation, including 'While others argue the opposite' functioning as a fragment sentence, 'making the rich to be more richer', and 'issues that involves money' (subject-verb agreement). Despite these recurrent errors, they rarely impede communication, and the majority of simple sentences are clear and well-structured.

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