Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-09-27
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Write about the following topic:
In many countries, family members work together in their family business.
Do you think family businesses have more advantages than disadvantages?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 4.5)
In today`s modern society, In many countriess family would like to work together in their family jobs. To the best of my knowledge, working with families is very beneficial for the members of society because they easily trust each other and also reduces mental issues. This eassy wil dissuss what are the advatages working with family. To begin with, the majority individuals would to work with relatives, as the believe eachother without exiation, For exempale, they spended alot of time with relative, and also the knew about everthing or families. In addtion, working with a family is very hepful for us, due to they do not betryed eachother, and also build a strong relastionship. However, working with a families make progress and reduces negetive effects, which is very vital for future career. Besides, I have seen many iconic business many the do work work with, due to nowaday`s they succesd Secondly, From my perspetive working wth families is very helful for us because, It reducess stress and put you in a good mood. For instance, some time we are not free we we easily say our relative today I am not capbale go to office, they are easilly cope. Despite, If we working with it reduces jealuse and make poliet relashionship with us. In addtion, families alawys support eachother, any diffcults time. Morever, families would not like to hurt to relative. In conclusion, I am convinced that working with families is advantages for the members of citizen because it keep business strong and diminish negetive plan. Besides, working with families always going to devlopment side, as they trust eache other.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 4.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 4.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.0 |
| Overall | 4.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0
The response attempts to address the prompt by discussing the advantages of working in a family business, such as trust and reduced stress. However, the position is not fully developed throughout, and the ideas presented are often repetitive and lack sufficient extension or relevant examples. For instance, the mention of iconic businesses working together is extremely vague and undeveloped. The essay also overlooks the second part of the implied prompt balance (disadvantages), focusing exclusively on advantages despite the question asking whether there are more advantages than disadvantages. This places the response firmly in Band 5, as ideas are limited and under-developed, and the task is only partially addressed.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0
The essay displays an attempt at paragraphing, but the overall organization and logical progression are frequently disrupted by severe structural issues and poor sentence flow. Cohesive devices are used, but they are often inaccurate or mechanically applied, such as 'Despite, If we working with it reduces jealuse'. Referencing is sometimes unclear, and the transition between ideas feels disjointed and repetitive. While paragraphs are present, the logical progression breaks down frequently, making it difficult for the reader to follow the argument smoothly. This aligns with the characteristics of Band 4, where information and ideas are not arranged coherently enough to ensure a smooth flow of meaning.
Lexical Resource: Band 4.0
The vocabulary used is basic and frequently repetitive, with numerous spelling and word-choice errors that strain the reader. Examples of noticeable errors include 'eassy', 'dissuss', 'advatages', 'exiation', 'Exempale', 'betryed', 'relastionship', 'negetive', 'succesd', 'perspetive', 'helful', 'reducess', 'capbale', 'jealuse', 'poliet', 'diffcults', 'Morever', and 'devlopment'. While the student attempts some broader vocabulary related to the topic, the high frequency of inaccurate word forms and spelling mistakes severely impacts lexical adequacy and impedes communication in several places, placing the response at Band 4.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.0
The response exhibits a very limited range of grammatical structures, with frequent and pervasive errors in tense, subject-verb agreement, and sentence construction. Examples include 'In today`s modern society, In many countriess family would like...', 'they spended alot of time', 'the knew about everthing', 'some time we are not free we we easily say', and 'families alawys support eachother, any diffcults time'. Complex sentence attempts are almost uniformly faulty, and basic grammatical rules are frequently broken. Punctuation and capitalization are also erratic throughout the text. These frequent errors distort meaning and make the text difficult to read, corresponding to Band 4.
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