Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-06

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Write about the following topic:

In many countries, family members work together in their family business.

Do you think family businesses have more advantages than disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In some nations, it is contended by many individuals that family business should be handled by their own children. In my perspective ,while this notion has many positive effects such as , consistency , productivity and strenghten relationships , it may lead to reducing employment opportunities for others.

Firstly, one of the primary benefit of working with family members is that people can strong their bonding with them and help them to make a fast progression and production. In a family business, people would be comfortable to do any work and they can take suggestions from their partners to make any specific decisions.As a result, when they work together and put all their efforts to make their business grow , they can achieve any goal in their lives.For example, In india, a network businessman named Mukesh Ambani , working with his sons and from last 5 years , they increased their overall profit to 80% more. With his son's creativity, hard work and qualifications, he become a 3rd richest personality in India.In addition, individuals do not have to start business from scratch, they can get it through their family.One significant advantage of this approach is that people could broden their knowledge reagarding any particular industry and improve their critical thinking and decision making skills, which would help them to develop their both personal and professional performance.

However, passing family companies to people's own kids could decrease the emloyment rate of the nation.To be more clear, when families start to pass their own businesses to their blood, other non- relative people can face various difficulties to find a better placement in any company.Consequently,the youth would be unemployed and discourged.Furthermore, if unemployment rate is higher in the country , there might be a chance to enhancement in crime rates.Morever, this trend can demotivate a young generation which can cause several other issues such as, poverty and unemployment.

In conclusion, although working with family members can be helpful to increase productivity and profit

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response5.5
Coherence and Cohesion6.0
Lexical Resource5.5
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.5
Overall5.5

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

The response addresses all parts of the prompt by discussing both the positive and negative aspects of family businesses, presenting a clear overall position. However, some ideas are underdeveloped or lack sufficient extension. For instance, while the writer mentions consistency and productivity in the introduction, these points are not fully explored in the body paragraphs. The example involving Mukesh Ambani provides some relevant support, but other supporting arguments rely on broad generalisations rather than deep elaboration, such as the claim that youth unemployment directly leads to increased crime rates without further context. To reach a higher band, the writer needs to extend all main ideas more thoroughly and provide more detailed, fully realized explanations and examples.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The essay displays a coherent overall arrangement with a clear attempt to structure the response into introduction, body, and conclusion paragraphs, although the conclusion is left unfinished. Paragraphing is generally utilized, but internal cohesion is sometimes mechanical or faulty. The writer uses basic cohesive devices like 'Firstly', 'However', and 'In conclusion', but referencing and transitions can be clumsy, such as 'To be more clear' or 'when families start to pass their own businesses to their blood'. Furthermore, spacing and punctuation issues around cohesive markers hinder smooth progression. To improve, the writer should employ a wider and more flexible variety of cohesive devices while ensuring that paragraph structures and referencing are maintained seamlessly throughout.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The vocabulary used is minimally adequate for the task, providing a sufficient range to communicate basic ideas about employment and business. The writer attempts some less common vocabulary items, such as 'productivity', 'progression', and 'placement', but these attempts are frequently marred by inappropriate word choice, collocation errors, or awkward phrasing, such as 'strenghten relationships', 'network businessman', and 'broden their knowledge reagarding'. Additionally, there are noticeable spelling and word formation errors throughout the text, including 'strenghten', 'reagarding', 'emloyment', 'discourged', 'enhancement', and 'Morever'. To achieve a higher score, the writer must expand their vocabulary range and demonstrate greater precision in word choice, spelling, and collocation.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

The writing demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, but attempts at complex structures often contain errors. There are frequent mistakes in article usage, prepositions, plurals, and subject-verb agreement, such as 'family business should be handled', 'one of the primary benefit', 'people would be comfortable', and 'young generation'. Punctuation and spacing errors are also prevalent, including spaces before commas and missing spaces after full stops (e.g., 'In my perspective ,while', 'decisions.As a result'). While these errors rarely completely impede communication, they are frequent enough to cause some difficulty for the reader. A higher band would require a greater proportion of error-free sentences and tighter control over complex grammatical patterns.

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