Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-21

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Write about the following topic:

In many countries, family members work together in their family business.

Do you think family businesses have more advantages than disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

It is often believed that family business should be run together by family members.I have different point of view from this statement because it envolves monoplies among family memebers. In this essay I will discuss the both views about this statement.

The main reason of my supporting this idea that family busniess should not run by its members is that it creats monoply because head of family want to rule over the business.For example, an old member of family always wants to have his hold over the business inspite of his insufficent skills and knowledge. As a result, business does not flourish and not have abilities to compete the other businesses.

Furthermore, family business ruled by its own members does not provide the opprtunities of employment for skilled and educated people.What I mean by this is that all posts of this business is just for family members wheter they have required qualities or not. Therefore, unemployment and inflation raise day by day in such socities.

On the other hand, there is a group who believe that family busniess should be run by their own members because it develops unity and strong relation among its members.They think that people from outsides can destroy their business because they do not have any experience of running business.When freshers are provided with the opportunities of joining family business they do not make remarkable performance which hinders the progress of their business.

To sum up, it can be said that although family business provides opportunities of employment, it also reduced the chances of jobs for skilled and educational people. I suggest that governments should regulate the family business to involve skilled youngsters for their progress.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

Your position is clear: you oppose family members running a business because this can concentrate control and restrict opportunities for qualified outsiders. You address both sides, including the counterargument that relatives may have stronger relationships and experience, and your conclusion offers a relevant recommendation about government regulation. These points keep the response focused on the question. However, some ideas are asserted rather than fully explained. For example, the claim that family businesses contribute to “unemployment and inflation” needs a clearer link or supporting example, and the advantages of family involvement receive less development than the disadvantages. Explain how family unity or experience can benefit a business, then weigh those benefits directly against the risks to make your argument more fully supported.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a coherent overall arrangement: an introduction, two paragraphs presenting disadvantages, a paragraph outlining the opposing view, and a conclusion. Signposts such as “Furthermore,” “On the other hand,” and “To sum up” help readers follow the main stages. Some connections, however, feel mechanical, and the progression within paragraphs is not always clear. The opening says you will discuss “both views,” but the first two body paragraphs develop only your opposing position, while the counterargument is compressed into one paragraph. References such as “this idea” and “this statement” are also vague. Use clearer topic sentences and connect each example explicitly to the claim it supports; this would make the argument’s development easier to follow.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use vocabulary relevant to the topic, including “monopolies,” “skilled and educated people,” “employment,” and “progress,” and you attempt more specific expressions such as “required qualities.” This gives you enough language to communicate your main position. However, spelling errors and inaccurate word choices are noticeable and sometimes make the reader pause: examples include “envolves,” “monoply,” “busniess,” and “socities.” Some phrases are also unnatural or imprecise, such as “have his hold over the business” and “people from outsides.” Build accuracy by checking spelling and learning common collocations for business and employment. Prefer precise terms such as “concentrate control” or “qualified applicants” where they express your meaning more naturally.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mix of simple and complex sentences, including clauses beginning “because,” “although,” and “when.” Most of the argument remains understandable, and the paragraph structure gives you opportunities to express cause and contrast. Some grammatical errors persist, particularly with articles, agreement, verb forms, and sentence boundaries. For instance, “family business should be run” needs an article or plural form, “all posts … is” has a subject–verb agreement problem, and “it also reduced” shifts to an unsuitable past form. There are also missing spaces after full stops and commas. Review article use and agreement, and proofread punctuation. More consistently accurate sentence patterns would let your ideas come across with less effort.

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