Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-26

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Write about the following topic:

In many countries, family members work together in their family business.

Do you think family businesses have more advantages than disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In majority of countries, family members work together in their family business. Easy succession of a business is one merit of working together as a family. Although the later end of this essay will discuss how jealousy can be a drawback in working togetehr as a family.

In majority of countries, it is bellieved that working together with family is advanteous in the sense that it is easier for the family to take over the business and manage it accurately if any incidence arises. particular business. For example, a man has a company known for the production of ceramics, he positioned his son a the managing director of the company. Many years after, the man passed, and the company is being succeded by the son who is the managing director. succeeding the father is easy because he has always worled closely with the father when he was still alive. With this ease that comes with working with family, i believe it is advanteous working with family.

Furthermore, in as much as ther is an advantage that comes with working with family, there is also a drawback in working with family as jealousy and bitterness can arise. Working with a family who is not genuinely happy that you are doing better than himself can lead to jealousy which can in turn lead to wicked thoughts. For example, Mr Ben is a well lnown successful business man in Abuja, who own two automobile companies in Abuja. One day, he decided that he want his cousin to come be a supervisor in one of his company as he would not always be available to supervise both companies. On arrival of his cousin, he started experiencing some losses in his business. Hence, he had no idea that it was the brother running him down as a result of bitterness that Mr Ben is doing better than himself.

In conclusion,in as much easy succesion of family business is an advantage of working with family, hence, ther is also a drawback that comes with it as a result of jealousy from some family members. I believe that working with family has more advantage than the draw back that comes with it.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address both sides of the question and state a clear view in the conclusion: family businesses have more advantages overall. The succession example, in which a son takes over a ceramics company after working with his father, is relevant and explains why continuity may be easier. You also identify jealousy as a disadvantage and illustrate it through Mr Ben’s cousin. However, the advantages are developed mainly through succession, while the drawback example is lengthy and its connection to family businesses could be explained more precisely. The opening also promises to discuss jealousy rather than clearly previewing your overall position. To strengthen the response, explain more fully why the benefits outweigh the risks and develop a second distinct advantage.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, separate paragraphs for an advantage and a disadvantage, and a conclusion. The examples generally follow the points they are intended to support. However, progression is weakened by repeated wording such as “working with family” and by connectors that do not always express the intended relationship. For instance, “Although the later end of this essay will discuss” is an awkward signpost, while “In conclusion, in as much… hence” combines links in a confusing way. Some references are also unclear, particularly the shift from “cousin” to “brother” in the second example. Use simpler, more accurate transitions and make each paragraph’s main point explicit before giving its example.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use relevant topic vocabulary, including “succession,” “managing director,” “drawback,” “jealousy,” and “bitterness,” which helps communicate the main ideas. There are also attempts at more specific business language, such as “production of ceramics” and “automobile companies.” However, spelling errors and inaccurate word choices are noticeable, including “bellieved,” “advanteous,” “incidence,” and “succeded.” Some phrases are also unnatural or imprecise, such as “the later end of this essay” and “doing better than himself.” These issues do not prevent the reader from understanding the overall argument, but they reduce precision and fluency. Proofread spelling carefully and learn common collocations for business succession and workplace relationships.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including clauses beginning with “Although,” “because,” and “as a result.” The main meaning is usually recoverable, but errors in sentence construction, agreement, articles, and verb forms occur across the response. For example, “a man has a company… he positioned his son” shifts tense, and “who own two automobile companies” does not agree with its subject. The opening “Although…” sentence is incomplete, and the conclusion’s “in as much… hence” construction is not grammatically controlled. Capitalisation and punctuation also need attention, especially the lowercase “i” and missing space after “conclusion,”. Practise accurate sentence boundaries and check subject–verb agreement and tense consistency.

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