Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-11-05

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Nowadays it's possible for people to buy many products or pay for treatments that help them to look younger.

Is this a good thing or a bad thing?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.5)

Nowadays, people can buy a wide range of products and pay for different treatments to look younger. Although, these products can improve people's confidence and appearance, I believe that this trends has more negative effects than positive ones.

On the one hand, using products and treatments can have some advantages . Firstly, better appearance can increase one person self confidence because they feel more relaxed when they use this product and boost their inner soul. Secondly, it helps them maintain their looks along with their age. For example, the show stoppers in the modelling industry requires good physique and clear skin where they need to hide all the signs of aging with the products which is helpful in building their self esteem.

On the other hand, there are several disadvantages to this trend. One serious problem is that some people may become obsessed with looking younger and spend excessive money on special treatments. As a result they may experience financial problems. Moreover, some cosmetic products can have side effects if they are use regularly and without proper consulting. For instance: A person who undergo frequent treatment can suffer from other related health problems and skin damage.

Another concern is that the popularity of anti-ageing can create unrealistic expectations about ageing. People may begin to believe that getting older is not a problem when you can hide all your defects through the treatments. This can lead to unexpected pressure for older people to look natural.

In conclusion although using products and treatments can help people look younger and feel confident, I believe this is a negative impact because it encourage people to spend excessively and create health problems. People should focus more on staying healthy by adapting the natural ageing process rather than trying to stop it completely.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

Your position is clear from the introduction: you acknowledge benefits but argue that the trend is more negative, and the conclusion restates this view. You address both sides and give relevant reasons, including financial strain, possible side effects, and pressure on older people. The modelling example supports the benefit of improved appearance, although the link to confidence and the specific claim about hiding signs of ageing could be explained more clearly. Some points are also asserted rather than fully developed: for example, explain how anti-ageing expectations create pressure, perhaps through workplace or social judgement. This covers the task well overall, but fuller explanation and more precise support for some ideas would make the response more convincing.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, a paragraph on advantages, two paragraphs on disadvantages, and a conclusion. The contrast between “On the one hand” and “On the other hand” helps readers follow the argument, while “Moreover” and “In conclusion” signal additions and closure. The progression from personal costs and health risks to wider social expectations is logical. However, some linking is mechanical, and a few references are unclear: “they feel more relaxed when they use this product” does not specify which people or products, and “This” in the final disadvantage paragraph could refer to more than one preceding idea. Use transitions more selectively and make pronoun references explicit to improve the flow and cohesion.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of vocabulary for the topic, including “excessive money,” “side effects,” “skin damage,” “unrealistic expectations,” and “natural ageing process.” These choices help communicate the main arguments, and the meaning is generally clear. There are also attempts at more specific expressions, such as “self esteem” and “signs of aging,” but some combinations are unnatural or imprecise: “boost their inner soul,” “show stoppers,” and “hide all your defects” do not express the intended ideas naturally. “Anti-ageing” is relevant, though the discussion could use more precise terms for cosmetic procedures and social pressure. Focus on accurate collocations and formal phrasing; this would make the vocabulary more flexible and convincing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

You use both simple and complex forms, including a concessive opening with “Although” and a conditional clause beginning “when you can hide…”. Most sentences remain understandable, but some grammatical errors recur. For example, “this trends has” has a number-agreement error, “the show stoppers … requires” has subject–verb disagreement, and “they are use regularly” uses the wrong verb form. There are also errors in “one person self confidence” and “a person who undergo frequent treatment,” involving possessive form and agreement. Punctuation is sometimes inaccurate, as in the comma after “Although” and the colon after “For instance.” Review agreement, verb forms, and sentence punctuation, while retaining the range of sentence structures you already attempt.

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