Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-11-10
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Nowadays it's possible for people to buy many products or pay for treatments that help them to look younger.
Is this a good thing or a bad thing?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
It becomes a quite popular to purchase numerous products and treatments that are beneficial to enhance the individuals beauty and help to maintain their younger age. The enlargement of these kinds of products leads to numerous health issues and inappropriate utilization of money. It has more negative effects on humans'lives as compared to its benefits.
The development of anti- ageing products can cause a plethora of health and skin-related issues. Most of the products contain high amount of chemicals that are unsuitable for humans'body and their skin-tissues. Although people show more concern about their skin and fitness, prefer to opt products that are helping them to look young. Consequently, the range of skin cancer is increasing day by day, number of cases demonstrate the use of chemicals on human skin is the main cause of untreatable diseases.
Moving on, since people are using a few supplements to complete the requirement of essential vitamins which play an integral role to live healthy lifestyle and provide assistance to prevent illness, they are spending a large amount of money on these products which increase their expenses. The prices of anti-ageing and other vitamin pills are very high. For instance, there are some treatments available to reduce the wrinkles from face. However, individuals can prevent this skin problem by obtaining a healthy and nutritious food habits, and following balanced diet is a cost-effective approach rather than treatments.
In conclusion, the usage of supplements and having treatments to cure the ageing problem is inclining. Nevertheless, it leads to financial crisis and raising the skin problems. People are impatient and more stressed regarding their personality but they do not aware about consequences that they will face later.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5
Your position is clear from the introduction: you consider the trend more harmful than beneficial, and the conclusion maintains this view. You address the question with two relevant reasons—possible health effects and financial cost—and the example of wrinkle treatments compared with a balanced diet helps illustrate the second point. This gives the response a sound, relevant basis. However, the health argument is asserted more than explained: the link between anti-ageing products, skin cancer and other diseases needs clearer support or a more cautious example. The discussion of supplements also shifts towards vitamins and general illness prevention, so its connection to looking younger is not always clear. Develop each reason more fully and directly connect it to the question to strengthen the response further.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5
The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction states your view, two body paragraphs present separate reasons, and a conclusion restates the negative judgement. Transitions such as “Moving on,” “For instance,” and “In conclusion” help signal the stages of the argument. The progression is generally understandable, but some links between ideas are abrupt or unclear. In the first body paragraph, the sentence beginning “Although people show more concern…” does not connect smoothly to the claim about chemicals, and the move from supplements to treatment costs in the next paragraph could be more explicitly signposted. Some linking phrases also feel formulaic. Use clearer cause-and-effect connections and refer back precisely to the products and treatments under discussion so the argument flows more naturally.
Lexical Resource: Band 6.0
You use an adequate range of topic-related vocabulary, including “anti-ageing products,” “skin-related issues,” “essential vitamins,” “wrinkles,” and “cost-effective approach.” These choices make the subject clear, and attempts at more formal language show ambition. However, some less common expressions are inaccurate or unnatural, such as “the enlargement of these kinds of products,” “inappropriate utilization of money,” and “the range of skin cancer.” There are also awkward combinations such as “healthy and nutritious food habits.” These do not usually prevent understanding, but they reduce precision and naturalness. Prefer familiar, accurate collocations—for example, “the growing popularity of these products,” “wasteful spending,” and “the incidence of skin cancer”—and check word forms and apostrophes when editing.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5
You attempt a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, including a concession with “Although” and a relative clause in “supplements … which play an integral role.” Most ideas remain understandable, but some grammatical errors recur and occasionally make relationships between ideas harder to follow. Examples include “It becomes a quite popular” (article and sentence construction), “people … prefer to opt products” (verb pattern), and “they do not aware” (missing verb). There are also problems with agreement and sentence structure, as in “the range of skin cancer is increasing … number of cases demonstrate.” Improve control of articles, verb patterns, and complete clause structure, then proofread punctuation and possessives. More accurate complex sentences would help you express the argument with greater clarity.
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