Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-09-04
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Nowadays it's possible for people to buy many products or pay for treatments that help them to look younger.
Is this a good thing or a bad thing?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
Recently people are purchasing anti-aging products and doing plastic surgeries on their bodies to look young. Using of all these products can help you to look better but they significant drawbacks that affects after a long time. It is a bad thing to do and in this essay I will discuss reasons for that.
Having a plastic surgeries on bodies can make you a better person by looks but most of the doctors are using nylon or synthetic materials on skin. After a very long time it becomes a part of the skin and people can see their side effects on skin such as rashes, swelling etc. 70-80% people reported that they have cancer after plastic surgey. Even many doctors also recommended taking pills instead of surgery but according to scientific reports both are equally bad for health.
In addition, cosmetic surgery it is very expensive treatment. Even after getting done, people needs to maintain their body parts and every 3-4 months needs to replace or touch up with the surgeon. As result, it is wasting money on unnecessary treatment which will give lifetime disease. It is look good for the some time but after that people got bored and becoming annoyed.
To conclude, taking a pills or cosmetic surguries of anti-aging it is looks good for sometimes but they have major health related issuse like cancer, swelling, rashes that will stay on the skin for the lifetime. Rightnow many actor and actresses doing these type of treatment because they need to look same as they look when they were younger doing this they can work more in the film Industries reasons for that audience like to watch movies who look handsome and beautiful.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The essay addresses the prompt by taking a clear position that anti-aging treatments are a 'bad thing.' However, the development of ideas is limited by the use of unsubstantiated and hyperbolic claims, such as the assertion that '70-80% people reported that they have cancer after plastic surgery.' This lack of factual grounding weakens the argument. While the essay covers the negative health impacts and financial costs, the reasoning is somewhat repetitive and lacks depth. To improve, you should focus on providing more logical, realistic arguments rather than relying on extreme statistics that may undermine your credibility as a writer.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The essay is organized into paragraphs, but the flow between and within them is often mechanical. While some cohesive devices are used (e.g., 'In addition,' 'To conclude'), they are sometimes used incorrectly or in a way that feels forced. For example, the transition 'As result' is grammatically incomplete. The progression of ideas is occasionally disjointed, particularly in the final paragraph where the discussion shifts abruptly to actors and actresses without a clear link to the previous points about health and cost. Improving the use of linking words and ensuring each paragraph has a clear, singular focus would enhance the overall structure.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but lacks the precision and variety required for higher bands. There is frequent repetition of basic terms like 'look,' 'skin,' and 'bad.' Some word choices are unnatural or inaccurate, such as 'doing plastic surgeries' (should be 'undergoing') and 'taking a pills' (should be 'taking pills'). The essay relies on a limited range of vocabulary, and there are several instances of awkward collocations. To achieve a higher score, focus on using more sophisticated synonyms and learning the correct verb-noun collocations associated with medical and cosmetic procedures.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The essay contains a high frequency of grammatical errors that occasionally impede the reader's understanding. Common issues include subject-verb agreement ('people needs,' 'it is looks good'), article usage ('a plastic surgeries'), and sentence structure ('Using of all these products can help you... but they significant drawbacks'). There is a lack of complex sentence structures, and the errors in basic grammar are persistent throughout the text. To improve, you should focus on mastering subject-verb agreement and the correct use of plural/singular nouns, as well as practicing the construction of more complex, error-free sentences.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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