Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-09-07

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Nowadays it's possible for people to buy many products or pay for treatments that help them to look younger.

Is this a good thing or a bad thing?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.5)

A growing number of anti-ageing products and treatments are available in the market. Although these products may have some side-effects, they can enhance the physical appearances of the users and can also boost their confidence levels.

To commence with, products and treatments for younger looking skin can be beneficial in several ways. They help people to improve looks. Treatments such as skin tightening, fillers and scar-removal surgeries elevates the skin texture and promote a younger looking skin. As a result, people feel more confident as they believe they are looking good. For instance, many people are unable to express themselves in a group because they lack confidence due to their appearances. Although discriminating people on basis of their looks in unethical, some people judge others on basis of how humans look and what they wear.

In addition to this, invention of these treatments and products have also contributed to the healthcare industry and the world economy. To elaborate, cosmetic surgeries and products have opened a new market for entrepreneurs to create flourishing businesses. By collaborating beauty with medical science, business leaders have created big renowned brands such as VLCC. They provide several employment opportunities in this sector, which directly impacts the economy of the country.

On the other hand, some people believe that these products harm the users. The dominant reason is that sometimes chemicals used in creams and serums cause more damage to skin by disturbing the pH balance. Furthermore, cosmetics treatments such as hair removal surgeries can damage they skin tissues leading to severe skin infections.

To recapitulate, this essay has discussed that improving the confidence levels in the individuals and boosting the economies by generating more revenue and jobs are the reasons why age-reversing products and treatments are a good development.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The response addresses all parts of the prompt, providing both the benefits and drawbacks of anti-ageing treatments. You maintain a clear position throughout, arguing that it is a positive development. The ideas are relevant, such as the psychological benefits of increased confidence and the economic impact on the beauty industry. However, the development of these points is somewhat limited; for instance, the discussion on economic impact could be more deeply explored with more specific examples beyond just mentioning a brand name. To reach a higher band, ensure that each supporting point is fully expanded with more detailed reasoning or illustrative evidence.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.0

The essay is logically organized with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. You use cohesive devices such as 'To commence with', 'In addition to this', and 'On the other hand' to signal transitions between ideas. However, some of the linking is slightly mechanical, and the progression within paragraphs could be smoother. For example, the transition from the economic benefits to the drawbacks in the third paragraph is a bit abrupt. Paragraphing is used appropriately, and each paragraph has a central topic, which helps the reader follow your argument effectively.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'anti-ageing', 'flourishing businesses', and 'pH balance'. There are some minor inaccuracies in word choice, such as 'collaborating beauty with medical science' (combining would be more natural) and 'discriminating people on basis of their looks in unethical' (should be 'is'). While you attempt some less common vocabulary, there is room for more precision and sophisticated collocations to elevate the tone of the essay. Overall, the vocabulary is sufficient to convey your meaning clearly without significant errors.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, such as the conditional and concessive clauses used throughout. However, there are several grammatical errors that persist. For example, 'elevates the skin texture' should be 'elevate' to agree with the plural subject 'treatments'. There are also issues with articles and prepositions, such as 'damage they skin tissues' (should be 'their') and 'on basis of' (should be 'on the basis of'). While these errors do not impede communication, they occur frequently enough to prevent a higher score. Focusing on subject-verb agreement and article usage will improve your accuracy.

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