Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-09-08

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Nowadays it's possible for people to buy many products or pay for treatments that help them to look younger.

Is this a good thing or a bad thing?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Nowadays, in this modern world people are more beauty conscious. However, in a lot of countries individuals they believe women should look young in every age while some people they believe people like women they look beautiful in every age and in every type of skin. For some individuals looking young is a goal of their life. Some people which are using social media mostly they are more interested in these type of activities.

Firstly, nowadays in this modern world people specially house wives they spent their free time on social applications like Instagram and Facebook. Women watch other girls which are already young and they are promoting brands for their own benefit. Moreover, some women gets insecure because of these people and they try a lot of expensive products. For example, In Asian countries women are taking interest in korean girls skin which are naturally blessed by clear and good skin but because of watching them women feel insecure and they waste their time and money on these type of things.

Secondly, In this era people like women they try new procedure like treatments and skincare on their natural skin which is normal and beautiful but after using those products by seeing others are using thats how a lot of women nowadays facing a lot of skin problems like acne, Scars and fine lines after using bad products on their natural skin. For instance, some women which are very young like in their 20s they start using anti aging products by seeing influencers and actors on Tvs and mobile phones Which is a very bad thing.

In conclusion, People are using a lot of anti aging products on their skin. However, some individuals they believe natural skin is more important. People should not use expensive treatments and skincare products. Sometimes these things can ruin your body and skin.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses the prompt by discussing the trend of using anti-aging products and treatments. You clearly identify the negative aspects, such as insecurity and potential skin damage. However, the position could be more consistently developed. While you mention that some people believe natural skin is beautiful, the essay leans heavily on the negative consequences without fully exploring the 'good thing' side of the argument, which is required for a balanced discussion. To improve, ensure you provide a more nuanced view that acknowledges why people might find these products beneficial before presenting your counter-argument, ensuring a more comprehensive development of ideas.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, each with a clear focus. You use basic cohesive devices like 'Firstly', 'Secondly', and 'In conclusion' to signal the structure. However, the flow between sentences is sometimes mechanical, and the use of referencing is occasionally unclear, such as in the phrase 'these type of activities' or 'these people'. To reach a higher band, try to use a wider variety of linking words and ensure that pronouns clearly refer back to their antecedents to improve the overall cohesion of your arguments.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'beauty conscious', 'insecure', and 'anti-aging products'. However, there is some repetition of basic words like 'people', 'women', and 'things'. Additionally, there are minor errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'in every age' (should be 'at every age') and 'taking interest in korean girls skin' (should be 'taking an interest in the skin of Korean women'). Expanding your vocabulary to include more precise academic collocations would enhance the quality of your writing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are frequent grammatical errors, particularly with subject-verb agreement ('some women gets insecure'), article usage ('on Tvs'), and sentence fragments or run-on sentences. For example, 'Some people which are using social media mostly they are more interested...' is grammatically awkward. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence construction and reducing errors in pluralization and verb tense, which will help your writing appear more controlled and professional.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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