Band 7.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 7.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-09-09
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Nowadays it's possible for people to buy many products or pay for treatments that help them to look younger.
Is this a good thing or a bad thing?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 7.0)
In recent times, it has become feasible for individuals to purchase expensive anti-aging products and afford beauty treatments, which may create a youthful appearance. In my view, it is a negative development as such products and treatments not only result in unrealistic expectations among consumers but also have detrimental health side effects in the long run.
The primary reason is that such treatments make consumers acquire unrealistic expectations about their appearance. Since they are not equally effective on everyone and the results may vary from person to person, many individuals struggle to accept their true aging features and further seek more expensive products and treatments. Moreover, those who get some positive results anticipate that they will retain their youthful appearance for a long time; however, this is far from the reality as the results are usually short-term. Thus, most of the treatments which promote age reversal negatively affect psychological health of the consumers.
Another significant factor is that numerous anti-aging products are tested on animals during the research phase before being launched in the market for human use, which showcases the animal cruelty behind this phenomenon. In addition, many scientific studies have identified toxic ingredients in such products which are harmful to humans. For example, recent death case of a bollywood actress reported she was on Glutathione beauty treatment and had a serious drug interaction which caused stroke and death. Thus, anti-aging products and treatments have serious consequences on animals' and humans' health.
In conclusion, many anti-aging products and treatments are associated with false expectations and deleterious adverse effects. Therefore, blindly chasing products and treatments to look younger is negative for both the pyschological and physical health of the consumers.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 7.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 7.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 7.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 7.0 |
| Overall | 7.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.0
You have clearly addressed the prompt by taking a firm position that the trend of anti-aging products is a negative development. Your ideas are relevant and well-supported, particularly the focus on psychological impact and health risks. To reach a higher band, ensure that your arguments are fully extended; for instance, while you mention animal cruelty, you could briefly explain why this is a societal concern rather than just a research phase issue. The structure is logical, and your position is maintained consistently throughout the essay, meeting the requirements for a well-developed response.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.5
The essay is well-organized with a clear introduction, two distinct body paragraphs, and a conclusion. You use cohesive devices effectively, such as 'The primary reason is that', 'Moreover', and 'In addition', which help guide the reader through your arguments. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate distinct ideas. To improve, ensure that the transition between the psychological impact and the physical health risks is even smoother. The progression of ideas is logical, and the referencing is generally clear, making the text easy to follow.
Lexical Resource — Band 7.0
You demonstrate a good range of vocabulary, using terms like 'feasible', 'deleterious', and 'adverse effects' appropriately. There is an attempt to use less common lexical items, which adds precision to your writing. However, there are minor spelling errors, such as 'pyschological', and some word choices could be more natural, such as 'recent death case of a bollywood actress'. Improving the precision of your collocations and ensuring consistent spelling will help you reach a higher band. Overall, your vocabulary is sufficient to convey your ideas clearly and with some sophistication.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 7.0
You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures effectively. Most of your sentences are error-free, and your control over grammar is generally strong. There are occasional minor slips, such as 'the psychological health' (missing 'the' before 'psychological' in some contexts) or minor punctuation issues. However, these errors do not impede communication. To aim for a higher band, try to incorporate a wider variety of complex grammatical structures, such as conditional sentences or more varied subordinate clauses, while maintaining your current level of accuracy.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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