Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-09-10

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Nowadays it's possible for people to buy many products or pay for treatments that help them to look younger.

Is this a good thing or a bad thing?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Due to advanced medical technology, people tend to do things like treatments and buy many products which help them look younger. In my opinion, this is a bad thing. The usage of many products will eventually lead to cancers. As well as this, it costs you a lot of money.

To begin with, let’s discuss the cancers which are involved with many products. Nowadays, companies are focusing on profit. Despite the health effects, they always prioritize profit over any other thing. For that reason, they usually do fewer clinical trials than are actually required. Imagine one particular tablet has to pass 1,000 clinical trials. Though this is the required count, they will do around 10 clinical trials and release the products to the market. This will lead the consumer into a dangerous position.

Furthermore, the next point is the higher cost involved with the treatments. Economically, when demand rises, the price will also rise. Since a lot of people are interested in the treatments, the market prices are going higher every day. Nowadays, this has become a trend. Due to the current economic condition in the world, people have more priorities than spending money on some treatments which help them look younger. As an example, people can buy a pension plan or invest money in some properties.

Finally, I would say this is a bad thing to do because using many products and treatments will lead to cancers. It will also cost you higher prices. It is better to invest additional money in your wealth.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses the prompt by taking a clear position that the trend is negative. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited and relies on generalizations. For instance, the claim that 'the usage of many products will eventually lead to cancers' is a significant over-generalization that lacks nuance or scientific backing. While the prompt asks for reasons and examples, the example of '1,000 clinical trials' is hypothetical and slightly illogical, which weakens the argument. To reach a higher band, you should provide more balanced, realistic arguments and ensure that your supporting examples are plausible and directly relevant to the core issue of anti-aging treatments.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is organized into clear paragraphs, each with a central topic. Cohesive devices such as 'To begin with', 'Furthermore', and 'Finally' are used to guide the reader through the argument. However, the progression of ideas is sometimes mechanical, and the links between sentences can feel repetitive. For example, the transition between the health argument and the financial argument is functional but lacks sophistication. The referencing is generally clear, but the overall flow would benefit from more varied cohesive devices and better integration of ideas within paragraphs to improve the logical progression.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The vocabulary is adequate for the task but lacks the range and precision required for higher bands. You rely on basic terms like 'many products', 'do things', and 'look younger' repeatedly. While you attempt some topic-specific vocabulary such as 'clinical trials' and 'economic condition', there is a lack of flexibility. Some word choices are slightly unnatural, such as 'cancers which are involved with many products'. To improve, focus on using more precise collocations and a wider variety of academic vocabulary to express your ideas with greater nuance and sophistication.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are recurring grammatical errors and awkward phrasings. For example, 'the cancers which are involved with many products' is grammatically clunky, and 'cost you higher prices' is an incorrect collocation. There are also issues with article usage and prepositional phrases. While these errors do not impede communication, they occur frequently enough to prevent a higher score. You should focus on refining your control over complex sentence structures and ensuring subject-verb agreement and correct preposition usage.

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