Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-09-11
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Nowadays it's possible for people to buy many products or pay for treatments that help them to look younger.
Is this a good thing or a bad thing?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
In this contemporary era, several new cosmetic treatments and products are easily available that help not only delay the early aging signs but also aid to look younger. People spend hefty amount on these procedures and it become a boon for them especially for those who work in the entertainment industry such as actors and models. This essay will examine the reasons that why it is a positive development for the society.
One of the major reasons is income. The companies earn huge amounts as profits and clients use these products to get clean and healthy skin. Moreover, it is one of the best sources of the revenue not only for production companies but also for general public who work as workers to earn their livelihood. Furthermore, an availability of these products and cosmetic is good thing especially for film stars provided they use everything under the guidance of the specialist.
Another supporting reason is confidence. people who are unhappy with visible ageing signs may feel comfortable in social and professional situations after undergoing a safe cosmentic treatment. A famous saying " first impression is the last impression". Hence, people want to look impressive every time whether on business meeting or casual get-together. In addition, costly plastic surgeries are majorly used to reduce the loss of accidents such as acid attacks, car and plan crash.
In conclusion, this is a good thing for the humans that they can use their money and get these products and treatments to look perfect and young provided they do regular check-ups with skin specialist and follow the instruction. Overuse of anything is harmful.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.0 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0
The response addresses the prompt by taking a clear position that the trend is positive. The ideas are relevant, focusing on economic benefits and personal confidence. However, the development of these ideas is somewhat superficial. For instance, the argument regarding 'income' focuses more on the industry's profitability rather than the societal impact of the products themselves. The mention of plastic surgery for accident victims is a strong point but feels slightly disconnected from the main theme of 'looking younger'. To reach a higher band, you should expand on the societal implications of these beauty standards rather than just the economic ones.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5
The essay is logically organized with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate distinct ideas. Cohesive devices such as 'Moreover', 'Furthermore', and 'In addition' are used to link sentences, though some transitions feel a bit mechanical. There is a clear progression of ideas, although the link between the economic benefits of the industry and the personal benefits of looking younger could be more smoothly integrated to improve the overall flow of the argument.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.0
You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'contemporary era', 'livelihood', and 'specialist'. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation, such as 'it become a boon' (should be 'has become') and 'an availability of these products and cosmetic' (should be 'cosmetics'). There are also minor spelling errors like 'cosmentic'. To improve, focus on using more precise collocations and ensuring that pluralization and word forms are consistently accurate.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0
The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are frequent grammatical errors, such as 'reasons that why' (redundant), 'it become a boon' (tense error), and 'on business meeting' (missing article). Punctuation is generally acceptable, but there are minor issues with article usage and subject-verb agreement throughout the text. Increasing the accuracy of these basic structures while incorporating more varied complex sentences would help elevate your score.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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