Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-09-11

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Nowadays it's possible for people to buy many products or pay for treatments that help them to look younger.

Is this a good thing or a bad thing?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In today's world everyone want to look young and attractive; therefore, they purchase anti-ageing products or spend a lot of money after medical treatments to looks younger. In my opinion, people should admire their natural look and avoid the use of costly products. This essay will discuss both views with relevant examples.

To begin with, nowadays nobody wants wrinkles, acne, eczema,psoriasis and many more problems on their face. Everyone wants bright and shiny skin and to achieve that they spend a lot of money behind products and treatments. As a result, it increase their self-confidence and outer beauty. For example, one of my friends had dark circles on his face; hence, he used to downplay him self at work. However, after the treatment, he felt confident about him self, which also improved his productivity and efficiency at work place. Moreover, use of this products help people get growth in their career. Many actors and actress use products to look young so that they can get younger roles in movies and series.

However, there are many drawbacks of these products and treatments. First and foremost, some time these products or treatments shows side effects, which cause life time suffer and pain. For example, my brother had the plastic surgery but his face got redness after treatment, which also changed his facial structure. Furthermore, to buy these products or to have these treatments people take loans and borrow money, which put them under financial burden. What is more, people should admire their natural facial features rather then using the products that might cause health problems in longer run.

To sum up, people should appreciate the natural beauty and still they want to use products they should use it for skin improvements not to change the natural structure of their body.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses the prompt by discussing both the benefits and drawbacks of anti-ageing products and treatments. You clearly state your position in the introduction and maintain it throughout. However, the development of ideas is somewhat uneven. While you provide personal examples, such as your friend's confidence or your brother's surgery, the analysis remains relatively superficial. To reach a higher band, you should expand on the broader societal implications of these trends rather than relying solely on anecdotal evidence. The conclusion is a bit repetitive and could more effectively synthesize the main arguments presented in the body paragraphs.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, each with a clear focus. You use a variety of cohesive devices such as 'To begin with', 'Moreover', 'However', and 'To sum up' to guide the reader through your arguments. While the progression is generally clear, some transitions feel slightly mechanical. Additionally, there are minor issues with referencing, such as 'use of this products' (should be 'these') and 'downplay him self' (should be 'himself'). Improving the flow between sentences and ensuring consistent pronoun usage would enhance the overall coherence of your writing.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'anti-ageing', 'productivity', 'efficiency', and 'financial burden'. However, there are several instances of awkward collocations and word choice errors, such as 'spend a lot of money behind products' (should be 'on'), 'downplay him self' (should be 'undermine his confidence'), and 'life time suffer' (should be 'lifelong suffering'). These errors do not impede communication, but they do limit your ability to convey ideas with precision. Expanding your vocabulary to include more sophisticated synonyms and idiomatic expressions would help elevate your score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

You attempt a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, which is a positive step. However, there are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text. Subject-verb agreement is a recurring issue, such as 'everyone want' (should be 'wants') and 'products or treatments shows' (should be 'show'). There are also errors with articles and prepositions, such as 'the use of this products' and 'at work place'. While these errors rarely prevent the reader from understanding your meaning, their frequency prevents the essay from reaching a higher band. Focusing on proofreading for basic subject-verb agreement and article usage will yield significant improvements.

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