Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-09-14

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Nowadays it's possible for people to buy many products or pay for treatments that help them to look younger.

Is this a good thing or a bad thing?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.5)

In the contemporary world, More people are investing on beauty products or on treaments for good looking skin that help them to look younger. To a large extend, I agree that it is a good thing to purchase beauty products and take skin treament procedures because it extends a person's professional career by making them look younger and devoting more number years to working. Additionally, it also boosts confidence when one's personality is younger.

One of the principal reasons of putting efforts in beauty enhancement is a career building. Younger women have more chances of promotions than older women because of their retirement age. Women acquiring different skin and facial treaments look younger to their age and can work upto 60 years with multiple promotions whereas older women is capable of working till 60 years too but have a very few chances of getting promotions or higher designations thinking that they may retire soon. For example, in movie, the director generally nominates a good looking and younger actress to their age rather than someone looking older to their age. Consequently, many heroines go for multiple face surgeries like botox, eye extentions, lips pigmentations just to look younger and get more work.

Another compelling reason is confidence. purchasing and getting medical treaments done on faces and body parts boosts confidence. Confidence is the key to perform and speak professionally at multiple organisations. Men or women in their 50's with confidence in their body language and younger looking ability can perform better than people who are actually younger but look older with no confidence at all. For instance, a woman looking 25 years old but is actually 30 years old and have 5 years of professional experience will have extensive experience because of her age and confidence that has built in these five years. Moreover, confidence generally comes with experience but personality is definetely a significant factor.

In my conclusion, although people invest a lot of money and time in buying plenty of products to look young, it increases the career chances with possible future promotions and boosts confidence. Consequently, I agree that it is a positive thing that people are investing in themselves in order to stay relevant professionally and gain confidence.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.0

The response effectively addresses all parts of the prompt by discussing whether spending money on youth-enhancing products and treatments is a positive or negative development, taking a clear stance that it is generally a good thing. Main ideas are introduced and supported with reasons regarding career longevity and personal confidence. However, some arguments lack full development or rely on slightly weak generalisations, such as the claim that younger women universally receive more promotions or that movie directors only cast younger actresses. While these points support the position well, they prevent the response from reaching the highest band. Overall, the task is properly addressed and the position remains clear throughout the essay, aligning well with the Band 7 descriptor.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay displays a clear logical organisation and progression throughout. Each body paragraph focuses on a distinct central theme, such as career building and confidence. Cohesive devices are used reasonably well to connect ideas, as seen with transition markers like 'Additionally', 'One of the principal reasons', and 'Another compelling reason'. However, paragraphing and referencing occasionally feel slightly mechanical, and minor mechanical issues in sentence transitions disrupt the overall flow. Paragraphing is used sufficiently and appropriately, separating the introduction, two body paragraphs, and conclusion clearly, which firmly places the performance at a Band 6.5 to 7.0 level.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The student demonstrates an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, successfully attempting less common and topic-specific items such as 'contemporary world', 'beauty enhancement', and 'designations'. However, there are noticeable spelling and word-choice inaccuracies throughout the text, including 'treaments' instead of 'treatments', 'extend' or 'extentions' instead of 'extensions', 'purchasing' written with a lowercase letter at the start of a sentence, and awkward phrasing such as 'younger looking ability'. These lexical errors do not impede communication, but they restrict the score to a solid Band 6.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The writer employs a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating attempts at varied structures like conditional and relative clauses. Nevertheless, there are persistent grammatical errors in preposition use, articles, and subject-verb agreement. Examples include 'investing on' instead of 'investing in', 'devoting more number years', 'older women is capable' (singular verb with plural subject), and 'have 5 years of professional experience... will have'. Punctuation and capitalisation errors also occur, such as 'More people' in the opening sentence. These errors do not impede overall understanding, fitting the Band 6 descriptor well.

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