Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-09-16
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Nowadays it's possible for people to buy many products or pay for treatments that help them to look younger.
Is this a good thing or a bad thing?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
Nowadays, in this world people love to look more young then their age. Some individuals like women and men both are taking interest in these type of activities. While some people they believe these skin treatments are wastage of their hard earned money. Some people thinks that people should take good care of their skin by uising skin products like not that expensive treatments. Some people like politicians and actors are influencing wrong thing to our young generation.
Firstly, Some individuals like parents they believe some influencers which are already looking young they are promoting these expensive skincares and treatments to public which is very bad thing for youngsters nowadays.Some of them are promoting creams for acne scars and for fine lines which are normal for humans but they made living life very hard for people nowadys.For instance, some students which are in their early 20's they are using anti aging creams and products and because of using these products they are facing health and skin problems which is dangerous for individuals future.
Secondly, Some individuals think that people who are getting different treatments every week they are wasting their money on useless things because whenever you stop taking these treatments your would look horrible which is not a good thing for them. For instance, Some people are taking laser and technical treatments by using technical devices which is very bad for people who have diseas like cancer and kidney problems a lot of times they damaged their skin and it creates a lot of other physical problems for them.
In conclusion, People think that spending time and money on skin treatment is useless for individuals skin and it creates a lot of healh issues and skin problems. For some people like parents they believe their children are blessed with good and healthy skin but by watching influencer and social people they are getting these treatments and they create problems for them.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response addresses the prompt by discussing whether spending money on looking younger is a good or bad thing, clearly taking the position that it is generally a negative trend due to physical risks and societal pressures. However, the development of ideas lacks depth and relies heavily on generalisations and slightly repetitive points rather than fully exploring nuanced arguments. For instance, the student mentions that influencers promote expensive products and that treatments can cause health issues, but these points are expressed somewhat simplistically without deeper analysis. Overall, the task is addressed adequately, placing this criterion at a band 5.5.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The essay is divided into an introduction, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Paragraphing is attempted, though paragraph breaks and internal structures feel somewhat fragmented. Cohesive devices such as 'Firstly,' 'Secondly,' and 'In conclusion' are used to signpost the response, but referencing is occasionally unclear, as seen in sentences like 'Some individuals like parents they believe some influencers...'. Additionally, repetition of phrases such as 'Some people' and 'Some individuals' creates a mechanical flow. Progression is visible, but the overall coherence is hindered by clunky transitions and repetitive sentence openings, justifying a band 5.0.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary used is basic and repetitive, frequently reusing terms like 'people', 'individuals', 'treatments', and 'products' throughout the essay. There are noticeable lexical errors and awkward collocations, such as 'look more young then their age', 'wastage of their hard earned money', and 'technical treatments'. While the meaning remains mostly clear to the reader, the range of vocabulary is limited and lacks the flexibility needed for higher bands. Spelling is generally acceptable, but word choices remain restricted, pointing directly to a band 5.0 level.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The essay displays a very limited range of grammatical structures. Most sentences rely on simple or coordinate clauses joined by conjunctions like 'and' or 'because', and attempts at complex sentences often result in structural errors, such as run-on sentences and dangling modifiers (e.g., 'For instance, some students which are in their early 20's they are using...'). Frequent errors in punctuation, subject-verb agreement, and articles are present throughout the text. While communication is not entirely impeded, the high density of grammatical inaccuracies places this performance firmly at a band 5.0.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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