Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-09-17

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Nowadays it's possible for people to buy many products or pay for treatments that help them to look younger.

Is this a good thing or a bad thing?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.5)

Currently, people can purchase various kinds of products or spend their money on medical treatments, which makes them look youthful. I believe this is a good thing because this practice makes people happy. Also, it creates business opportunities for skin care manufacturing companies and medical specialists. This essay will discuss the benefits of this approach.

When compared with the last decade, now individuals focus more on their appearance. This is not limited to women because men are also worried about their looks. The main reason is that an attractive appearance makes them happy. Therefore, people spend a lot of money on their medical treatments. For instance, South Korea is very famous for plastic surgery. A number of people visit South Korea for the surgeries. Although there are some side effects, people buy more products and pay for their treatments to satisfy themselves.

This habit increases the new business opportunities and sales for the companies and doctors. When women and men are willing to spend their savings for surgeries and treatments, it will generate high sales for the companies. Moreover, demand for dermatologists has drastically increased as people are waiting to get the treatments. For example, in North America, dermatologists are earning more than general physicians and other specialists.

In conclusion, people have a number of options to look younger as they can purchase products or pay for the treatments. Even though there are some bad results, I believe this is a good thing, because people should be able to decide on their own happiness and youthfulness that makes them happy. Additionally, this opens more opportunities for businesses and medical staff.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The response addresses all parts of the task, presenting a clear position throughout that anti-aging products and treatments are a positive development. In the introduction, the writer outlines the main arguments regarding personal happiness and economic benefits for businesses. These ideas are extended and supported in the body paragraphs with relevant examples, such as South Korea's plastic surgery industry and the rising demand for dermatologists in North America. The arguments are generally well-developed and easy to follow, satisfying the requirements for Band 6.5 to Band 7.0. While the support tends to over-generalise slightly in places, the response thoroughly covers the prompt and maintains a clear, consistent point of view from start to finish.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.0

The essay displays a clear overall progression and logical organisation throughout. Each paragraph has a distinct focus, beginning with an introduction, moving to personal motivations and economic benefits, and concluding with a summary of the main points. Cohesive devices such as 'When compared with the last decade', 'Therefore', 'For instance', and 'Moreover' are used effectively to guide the reader through the arguments. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate distinct ideas. Although some referencing and linking phrases feel slightly formulaic, the logical sequencing of ideas and sufficient use of cohesive ties comfortably meet the requirements for a Band 7.0 score.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.5

The student uses an adequate and generally appropriate range of vocabulary for the task, such as 'youthful', 'plastic surgery', 'dermatologists', and 'economic opportunities'. There are successful attempts to use less common vocabulary, though some word choices and collocations feel a bit basic or repetitive, such as 'make them look youthful', 'buy more products', and 'bad results'. Spelling and word formation are generally accurate, and minor inaccuracies do not impede communication. The lexical range is sufficient for flexibility and precision, placing the response solidly in the Band 6.5 to Band 7.0 range, where vocabulary is adequate to convey the intended meaning clearly.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.5

The response demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, incorporating relative clauses, conditional elements, and participial phrases successfully. Examples like 'When women and men are willing to spend their savings for surgeries and treatments, it will generate high sales for the companies' show good control over complex structures. While there are some minor awkward phrasings and occasional grammatical slips—such as 'spend their savings for surgeries' instead of 'on surgeries'—these errors do not impede communication. The majority of simple sentences are error-free, and punctuation is managed reasonably well, aligning closely with the descriptors for a Band 6.5 performance.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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