Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-09-17

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Nowadays it's possible for people to buy many products or pay for treatments that help them to look younger.

Is this a good thing or a bad thing?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In this modern era, people spend their money on products and treatments that help them to look younger. Some people believe that using such products help develop confidence and self esteem. However,some individuals argue that people should not waste impulsive money on these certain beauty treatments as it may affects their body in a negative way.

One of the main reason of using such products is that it can helps people to look attractive and younger. Nowadays, people gone through various surgeries to change their body parts. Moreover, they are willing to consume money on expensive body serums, pills to eliminate wrinkles and blemishes on the face. Thus, it helps people to become more confident and happier. For example, many actresses consult with their doctors for the surgeries to enhance their face features and body parts, because they want to stay in film industry for a long period of time.

On the other hand, there are some drawbacks associated with this trend. One of them is wastage of hard earned money. People tend to spend a large amount of their income on surgeries, which might sometimes affect their body badly and results in cardio diseases. for instance, a press was printed in 2024, in which they claim that over 70 percent people suffer from heart related diseases due the use of strong products and treatments. So, people should conside negative side carefully before making. decision.

In conclusion, although such kinds of treatments and products have numerous advantages, but we cannot ingnore negative side. I believe that people should focus on their diet and daily exercise rather than reliant on convenient ways to look younger.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response6.0
Coherence and Cohesion6.0
Lexical Resource5.5
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.5
Overall6.0

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses all parts of the task by discussing both the advantages and disadvantages of anti-aging products and treatments, and provides a clear personal position in the conclusion. The ideas are generally relevant, suggesting that these products can boost confidence while acknowledging financial and health risks. However, the development of some ideas is limited and relies on sweeping generalisations or vague examples, such as the unsupported claim that '70 percent people suffer from heart related diseases due the use of strong products.' Despite these weaknesses in support, the core requirements of addressing the prompt are met, aligning with a Band 6.0 performance.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay displays a coherent overall arrangement with a clear four-paragraph structure comprising an introduction, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate distinct points of view. Cohesive devices such as 'Moreover', 'Thus', 'On the other hand', and 'In conclusion' are utilised to signal transitions between ideas. However, referencing and cohesion are sometimes mechanical or faulty, as seen in awkward phrasing like 'a press was printed in 2024, in which they claim', which disrupts the smooth logical flow. Overall, the organisational structure is sufficiently clear to earn a Band 6.0.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The writer demonstrates an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, attempting some less common lexical items such as 'eliminate wrinkles and blemishes', 'hard earned money', and 'cardio diseases'. However, there are notable word-choice errors, collocations issues, and slips throughout the text, including 'waste impulsive money' instead of spending impulsively, 'consume money' instead of spend money, and 'ingnore' (spelling error). While these errors do not severely impede communication, they restrict the lexical score to Band 5.5, as the vocabulary control lacks the consistency and precision required for a higher band.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The response features a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating attempts at subordination and relative clauses, such as 'Some people believe that using such products help develop confidence'. However, there are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text, particularly regarding subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'products help develop' and 'it can helps people') and prepositional use (e.g., 'making. decision' and 'reliant on'). Furthermore, punctuation is occasionally faulty, and word form errors like 'affects their body' instead of 'affect' persist. Because these errors occur regularly without severely distorting the overall meaning, the performance fits the Band 5.5 descriptor.

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