Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-09-17

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Nowadays it's possible for people to buy many products or pay for treatments that help them to look younger.

Is this a good thing or a bad thing?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In the recent times, public is more interested in buying items and procedures that could make them look younger than their actual age. I believe that it is a bad thing because they can cause some detrimental effects on your skin and your body. Additionally, it can also raise unrealisttic beauty standard and mental stress.

Firstly, skin procedures and beauty treatments may have awful consequences on a person's health. These are never completely risk free. However, they can cause skin infections, scarring, and serious complications. For instance, a recent study shows that the skin tightening procedure via laser and botox can raise the chances of scarring that can also convert into skin cancer. Also, some beauty creams contain murcury and lead that can furthur harm the skin.

Secondly, this kind of treatments can also lead to increase in unrealistic expectations that could result in psychological pressure and depression. Society becomes more concious and obsess over small flaws. Furthermore, it can also lead to increased financial burdon. For example, if a woman over 50 is done with botox to get rid of her wrinkles, then the other women of the same age would also expect to look younger like her and spend more money to look like her. Consequently, a rise in expenses.

To conclude, i would say that spending money on purchasing expensive products and method just to look young is a bad thing because it not only causes serious skin problems but also causes some detrimental psychological effects and can also lead to increase expenditures.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses all parts of the task by discussing whether anti-ageing products and treatments are a good or bad thing, and clearly states a position that it is a negative trend. The ideas are relevant, focusing on health risks and psychological pressure. However, the development of these ideas is somewhat limited and occasionally relies on broad generalizations, such as the claim that skin tightening procedures can convert into skin cancer. While the position is clear throughout, the support for the arguments could be extended further with more precise explanations or varied examples to fully reach a higher band. Overall, the task is addressed adequately, meeting the basic requirements for idea presentation and stance.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The response has a clear overall arrangement with an introduction, two distinct body paragraphs, and a conclusion, fulfilling the basic requirements of paragraphing. Cohesive devices are used to signal progression, such as 'Firstly', 'Secondly', 'Additionally', and 'To conclude'. However, some of the referencing and logical transitions are slightly mechanical or faulty, such as the abrupt shift in the second body paragraph regarding peer pressure and financial burden. Furthermore, repetition of sentence structures in the body paragraphs affects the overall fluency of the progression. Paragraphing is used sufficiently, but the management of internal paragraph cohesion needs more flexibility.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The student uses an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, successfully incorporating terms such as 'detrimental effects', 'complications', 'psychological pressure', and 'financial burden'. There are, however, several noticeable spelling and word choice errors, including 'unrealisttic' instead of 'unrealistic', 'concious' instead of 'conscious', 'obsess' instead of 'obsessed', 'burdon' instead of 'burden', and 'furthur' instead of 'further'. Less common vocabulary is attempted, but these inaccuracies and occasional awkward collocations prevent the lexical score from reaching a higher band. Communication is not impeded by these errors, reflecting a solid Band 6 level.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The writer demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, utilizing conditional structures and relative clauses (e.g., 'treatments that help them to look younger', 'if a woman over 50 is done with botox'). There are, however, several grammatical errors and awkward phrasings, such as 'In the recent times' instead of 'In recent times', 'public is more interested' where 'the public are' or 'people' is more appropriate, and 'is done with botox' rather than 'gets botox injections'. Punctuation errors also appear, notably the lowercase 'i' in the conclusion. These errors do not impede communication, but they occur frequently enough to preclude a higher score.

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