Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-09-17
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Nowadays it's possible for people to buy many products or pay for treatments that help them to look younger.
Is this a good thing or a bad thing?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.5)
In recent years, the increasing use of products and treatments that help people look younger has attracted considerable attention. Although people hold different views on this issue, I believe that this is generally a positive development because it can improve people's confidence and give them greater control over their appearance. This essay will examine the main aspects of this issue.
To begin with, beauty products and treatments can improve people's confidence because they may help individuals feel more comfortable and satisfied with their appearance. This can have a considerable impact on people's everyday lives. For example, a person who is concerned about visible signs of ageing can use suitable skincare products and feel more confident in social situations. This demonstrates the practical importance of this point.
Furthermore, modern cosmetic treatments can provide people with more choices because individuals can decide how they want to manage changes in their appearance as they age. Its effects can also extend beyond individuals and influence the wider community. For instance, an adult can choose a professional skin treatment to reduce visible signs of ageing without undergoing major cosmetic surgery. This illustrates why this aspect deserves attention.
However, it should also be recognised that some people may spend excessive amounts of money on unnecessary treatments because of social pressure to maintain a youthful appearance. This perspective should not be overlooked when considering the issue as a whole.
In conclusion, I believe that this is generally a positive development because it can improve people's confidence and give them greater control over their appearance. This is mainly because these products can increase personal confidence and modern treatments provide individuals with greater choice. Overall, these factors should be considered together when evaluating this issue.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 7.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 7.0 |
| Overall | 6.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5
The student addresses all parts of the prompt by discussing both sides of the issue (youth-enhancing products and treatments) and clearly states a position that it is generally a positive development. The main ideas are relevant and supported with examples, such as skincare products improving confidence in social situations and cosmetic treatments giving adults choices without major surgery. A counter-argument is also briefly acknowledged regarding excessive spending and social pressure. However, while the ideas are relevant, some points feel somewhat repetitive and under-developed, relying on generalised explanations rather than deeper exploration or fully realised examples. Overall, the task is addressed adequately, fulfilling the requirements for Band 6.5 or a solid Band 6 performance.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.0
The response is logically organised with a clear overall progression. Each paragraph has a distinct focus, moving from an introduction to two body paragraphs supporting the main view, followed by a counter-argument and a concluding summary. Cohesive devices such as 'To begin with', 'Furthermore', 'However', and 'In conclusion' are used appropriately to guide the reader through the text. Referencing is generally clear, and paragraphing is used sufficiently. While the cohesion is functional and makes the text easy to follow, it occasionally relies on somewhat mechanical transition markers rather than more flexible, sophisticated linking techniques. Therefore, it meets the standard for Band 7.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.0
The student demonstrates an adequate range of vocabulary suitable for the task, successfully using terms such as 'considerable attention', 'visible signs of ageing', 'social pressure', and 'cosmetic treatments'. There is an attempt to use less common vocabulary like 'undergoing major cosmetic surgery' and 'personal confidence'. However, the vocabulary is at times repetitive, recycling phrases like 'improve people's confidence', 'visible signs of ageing', and 'appearance' multiple times across the essay. Word choice and collocations are generally natural, and spelling is accurate throughout, but the lack of lexical variety and precision keeps the score at a Band 6.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 7.0
The student displays a good mix of simple and complex sentence structures, incorporating subordinate clauses effectively (e.g., 'Although people hold different views on this issue, I believe that this is generally a positive development...'). There is good control over grammar and punctuation, with many error-free sentences throughout the response. Minor slips or slightly repetitive structural patterns occur, but they do not impede communication at all. The control over sentence construction and overall grammatical accuracy comfortably support a Band 7 rating.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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