Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-09-18
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Nowadays it's possible for people to buy many products or pay for treatments that help them to look younger.
Is this a good thing or a bad thing?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 4.5)
In this modern world, a number of changes are taking place regarding many product. Some of these changes bring benefits, while other have neagtive effects. Nowadays it's possible for people to buy many products or pay for treatments that help them to look younger. The following will discuss both sides of the statement and state my opinion.
To commence with one side, a part of the population believe that nowdays some people buy many productfor trratment that help them. it is very good thing for everyone . they want to look younger in life . People use these treatment carefully and they do not dependent to them. Some people use different product for example skin , surgery cosematic. They use the many product for health .they want to make better by this product and some treatment can have health benefits.
Conversely, a section of scocity thinks there are lot of benefits of loolking younger people feel more confident about this apperance.They want to use some product everyday after that they want to go another placese for attend the meeting and job . it is very good impression and look like younger to another person by product. They want to increase own knowledge or experience in life.
According to my perspetive, i think that there are also some product is major problem these product treatment. some product is very expansive . Some people use some product and they can have a skin problem for health.Some people may become unhappy by product.
To conclude, many product has both pros and cons. On balance however, it should be made sure that positives are promoted and negatives are eliminated
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 4.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.0 |
| Overall | 4.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response attempts to address both sides of the prompt regarding anti-aging products and treatments, but the development of ideas is limited and at times confusing. For instance, the writer states that people use treatments carefully and do not depend on them, but then mentions potential health problems and expensive costs in the body paragraphs. The position is somewhat unclear due to weak expression and sudden shifts in thought. While the prompt is generally touched upon, the ideas lack sufficient extension and support to meet the higher band criteria. Under the official descriptors, this performance aligns most closely with a band 5.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The essay is divided into paragraphs, and attempts are made to use cohesive devices such as 'To commence with one side' and 'Conversely'. However, the logical progression is frequently disrupted by fragmented sentences and confusing transitions. Referencing is often unclear, particularly with pronouns like 'they' and 'some product', making it difficult to follow who or what is being referred to. Paragraphing is present, but internal cohesion is faulty and mechanical. This reflects the characteristics of a band 4.5 or 5.0, settling at a band 5.0 for its basic organisational structure.
Lexical Resource — Band 4.0
The vocabulary used is basic and repetitive, with frequent spelling errors such as 'product' instead of products, 'neagtive', 'trratment', 'cosematic', 'scocity', 'apperance', 'placese', and 'expansive' (likely meaning expensive). Less common vocabulary is attempted with noticeable inaccuracy, such as 'dependent to them'. These lexical errors cause some difficulty for the reader and restrict the range of vocabulary to a minimally adequate level, fitting the band 4 descriptors.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.0
The writer relies heavily on simple sentences alongside poorly controlled complex structures. There are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text, including subject-verb agreement issues ('a number of changes... are... regarding many product', 'a section of scocity thinks'), incorrect prepositions ('dependent to them'), and tense inconsistencies. Punctuation is also problematic, with missing capitalisation at the beginnings of sentences and erratic spacing. These frequent errors often cause difficulty for the reader, placing the response firmly in the band 4 category.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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