Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-09-22
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Nowadays it's possible for people to buy many products or pay for treatments that help them to look younger.
Is this a good thing or a bad thing?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
Some people believe that school should provide opportunities to learn about personal finance while others think that this is the responsibility of parents. Although parents can teach children about daily use of money, I believe school should also provide financial education because it is an important skill.
On the one hand, many people believe that parents should taught children how to handle the money because parents are the first teacher. They can teach their children about save the money avoid unnecessary spending. Because every family has their own budget so, though this they can teach their children how they can set their budget and full fill their needs in a particular budget.
On the other hand, Schools can provide more structured and equal financial education. Not all parents have enough knowledge and sometimes they do not have enough time to teach their children about finance. Schools should teach practical topics such as saving, budgeting, taxes, credit cards and responsible spending. This can help young people make better decision. Moreover, if financial education is included in school curriculum, students have basic knowledge about finance.
In my opinion, both schools and parents should share the responsibility. Parents can teach children through everyday experiences, while schools provide professional and organized lessons. This combination would give students a better understanding of how to manage their money.
In conclusion, although parents play important role in teaching children about money, schools
Should also provide financial education. I believe both learning from school and home make young people more responsible.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.0
Although the prompt discusses anti-ageing products and treatments, the student has mistakenly answered a completely different prompt regarding financial education in schools versus homes. This represents a major task misunderstanding. According to the band descriptors, an off-topic or misread response cannot score above Band 4 for Task Achievement. The student addresses the irrelevant prompt with a clear position and supporting ideas, which saves it from a lower score, but the failure to address the actual exam question regarding looking younger and beauty treatments severely impacts this criterion.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
Despite the severe content mismatch, the student demonstrates a logical and discernible paragraph structure. The essay is divided into an introduction, clear body paragraphs with standard signposting such as 'On the one hand' and 'On the other hand', and a conclusion. Cohesive devices are used reasonably well, though referencing is occasionally repetitive. Paragraphing is used sufficiently to structure the ideas, granting the text a coherent overall arrangement despite the off-topic subject matter.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The student displays an adequate range of vocabulary for a basic communicative task, incorporating terms like 'financial education', 'curriculum', and 'responsible spending'. However, there are noticeable lexical errors and awkward collocations, such as 'parents should taught children' and 'full fill their needs'. Repetition of common words like 'money' and 'children' is frequent. While spelling is generally accurate, the lexical range is limited and contains errors that occasionally draw attention.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The student attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, including conditional and concessive structures like 'Although parents can teach... I believe...' and 'Moreover, if financial education is included...'. However, grammatical accuracy is weak, with frequent errors including tense and verb-form mistakes such as 'parents should taught' and 'children about save the money'. Punctuation is also faulty in places, such as comma placement before conjunctions. These errors require some effort to decode.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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