Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-09-25

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Nowadays it's possible for people to buy many products or pay for treatments that help them to look younger.

Is this a good thing or a bad thing?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Individuals are purchasing various products or choose a treatments that assist them to look younger in this modern era. In my opinion, everyone should follow the selfcare is a good routine that enhance the appearance. some products that are inspired by celebrities on social media plays a vital role to the youngsters. While, some people thinks it is not worthy and it is waste of money and time.

Firstly, better product quality or cure helps to build smoother skin which boost the personality. Some job opportunities are majorly looking for a better personality with them they can get a good sell. For example, The shop manager of the "Sephora" has the ugly skin and did not tied her hair properly, individuals will not prefer to visit the store or not buy products from there. Adults who works with multi national companies always follows these types of daily routines that boost their confidence while meeting with the new customers.

Secondly, many product manufacturers are running their advertisement on social media where adults easily get trapped and try that product immediately. For instance, individual who have dark-spots and show and advertise on Instagram "Ordinary face serum" which helps you to remove dark-spots on your face in just 15 days. Therefore, adults prefer to buy directly without even concerning the dermatologist. Sometimes wrong product creates skin issues like skin burning and irritation.

In conclusion, attractive look with good personality both are essential because "the first impression is the last impression". However, the majority of the men do not like to use skincare routines but they would like to follow beard and haircare routine to look younger.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The response addresses the prompt by discussing whether spending money on anti-aging products and treatments is a positive or negative development. The writer takes a clear position that these routines can boost confidence and personality, though they also acknowledge drawbacks like impulsive buying and potential skin damage from social media ads. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited and relies on sweeping generalisations, such as claiming that 'the majority of the men do not like to use skincare routines.' The examples provided, such as the manager at Sephora or the Ordinary face serum ad, are relevant but lack depth. While all parts of the prompt are addressed, the arguments would benefit from further extension and more sophisticated support to reach a higher band level.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The essay displays a generally coherent overall arrangement with a clear attempt at paragraphing, separating the introduction, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion. However, cohesion is frequently faulty and mechanical. Transition phrases are misused or awkward, such as starting paragraphs with 'Firstly,' followed by sentences that do not logically build into a cohesive sequence. Referencing is also unclear at times, as seen with 'with them they can get a good sell' and 'individuals will not prefer to visit the store.' Paragraphing is present, but internal logical progression is often disrupted by abrupt shifts in topic and repetitive sentence structures, limiting the overall flow and organization of the response.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The student uses an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, successfully incorporating terms such as 'multi-national companies,' 'dermatologist,' and 'skin irritation.' However, there are noticeable lexical errors and awkward word choices throughout the text, including 'choose a treatments,' 'enhances the appearance' (used ungrammatically as 'is a good routine that enhance'), 'ugly skin' instead of poor skin, and 'get a good sell.' While the writer attempts less common vocabulary, frequent inaccuracies in word choice, morphology, and collocation prevent the response from achieving a higher band. Nevertheless, the intended meaning remains generally clear despite these linguistic slips.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The writing demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, attempting relative clauses ('products that are inspired by') and conditional or temporal structures. However, grammatical accuracy is weak, featuring a high frequency of errors. Examples include subject-verb agreement issues ('selfcare is a good routine that enhance'), incorrect article usage ('the ugly skin'), tense inconsistencies ('Adults who works'), and fragment sentences ('While, some people thinks...'). Punctuation and phrasing errors also occur regularly, such as 'individual who have dark-spots and show and advertise.' These errors occasionally cause difficulty for the reader and restrict the control of complex structures.

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