Band 7.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 7.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-09-27

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Nowadays it's possible for people to buy many products or pay for treatments that help them to look younger.

Is this a good thing or a bad thing?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 7.0)

In this modern society, purchasing cosmetic supplies and undergoing procedures such as plastic surgery and Botox are becoming increasingly common among people, as these products and surgeries improve their physical appearance and overall health. I believe that this trend has fewer advantages than disadvantages.

To begin with, the trend of using cosmetic products and undergoing procedures has been common for many decades. People apply these products to improve their skin and foster their overall personality. Individuals, with increasing age, often get wrinkles on their faces, which develop a certain sense of embarrassment among people and motivate them to apply skin products. This benefits them by increasing social interaction and boosting their self-confidence. Furthermore, procedures such as skin transplants and plastic surgery help individuals improve their overall health. For instance, individuals who have excess fat volume often undergo skin removal surgery, which extracts additional fat from around the body parts. Hence, this improves the individual's health and physical appearance.

However, with certain benefits, this trend also has some consequences. In this developing society, many companies claim that their cosmetic products are composed of natural ingredients, but this is often a false statement. With the increasing demand for cosmetic products and the desire to achieve positive feedback from consumers, manufacturers add certain chemicals such as salicylic acid, which is quite beneficial for removing excess oil from the skin. However, excessive use of these products often leads to skin irritation and increased sensitivity to UV rays. Furthermore, procedures such as plastic surgery often have a high probability of failure. People have the false assumption that getting these treatments will improve their physical appearance. However, a minor mistake can affect the skin and further lead to negative development. For instance, celebrities get more social attention due to their physical appearance; this motivates people to undergo certain skin surgeries, but sometimes individuals are not satisfied after the operation. Hence it leads to create a negative impact on them and make themselves isolated and prevent any social interaction, thus affect their mental health.

In conclusion, although cosmetic products and procedures are beneficial to improve physical appearance and maintain a youthful look, excessive use and a small mistake can make a significant impact on individual mental health and appearance.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 7.0

The response addresses all parts of the task by discussing both the positive and negative aspects of using anti-aging products and procedures, and presents a clear position that the trend has fewer advantages than disadvantages. Ideas are extended and supported with relevant examples, such as mentioning wrinkles, skin removal surgery, and the influence of celebrities. However, there is a minor tendency to over-generalise regarding the dangers of chemicals and celebrity influence, which places this response comfortably at Band 7. The main arguments are well-developed, and the conclusion succinctly reiterates the writer's perspective.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 7.0

The essay demonstrates clear logical organisation and progression throughout. Each paragraph has a distinct focus, starting with an introduction, moving to advantages, then disadvantages, and concluding with a summary. Cohesive devices are used reasonably well, such as 'To begin with', 'Furthermore', and 'However'. Paragraphing is used sufficiently and appropriately. Nevertheless, occasional referencing and transitional links are slightly mechanical, such as 'Hence it leads to create a negative impact', which prevents the cohesion from reaching the higher descriptor of being fully unobtrusive.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.5

The writer uses an adequate and generally appropriate range of vocabulary for the task, successfully incorporating less common lexical items such as 'cosmetic supplies', 'wrinkles', 'sensitivity', and 'isolated'. There are some successful attempts at precision, though occasional inaccuracies in word choice or collocation appear, such as 'lead to create a negative impact' instead of 'create a negative impact' or 'lead to a negative impact'. Spelling and word choice errors do not impede communication, allowing the piece to sit securely at Band 6.5.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.5

The response displays a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating control over relative clauses and conditional-like contexts. There are frequent error-free sentences, such as 'People apply these products to improve their skin and foster their overall personality.' However, a few grammatical inaccuracies persist, notably verb-form errors and awkward phrasing like 'make themselves isolated and prevent any social interaction, thus affect their mental health' instead of 'affecting their mental health'. Punctuation is generally accurate, and errors rarely impede communication.

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