Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-09-28
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Nowadays it's possible for people to buy many products or pay for treatments that help them to look younger.
Is this a good thing or a bad thing?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
These days, it is possible for individuals to purchase more things related to their care or spend on treatments to look younger.While this trend offers certain advantages,I believe it even brings some drawbacks,making it both a benefical and a harmful thing.In my opinion,this has both good and as well poor aspects,while it is necessary to maintain yourself, it also results in wasteage of money and also sometimes damage your skin.
On the one hand,shop too much products and invest in treatments can be seen as a positive development because in this way people can take care of their skin, body and they can maintain them according to the society demands.Moreover, people looks happy and fresh when their skin is good and, they also spend on themselves to look graceful and young.In this way, they cannot look old and dull and live their life happily.
On the other hand, there are several bad consequences of this trend.Firstly, if humans buy more and extra things or spend all money on this without knowing the product is good or bad ,sometimes they burn their skin,because each goods is not suitable for every skin type.Every one has different skin type.Secondly, by all this they waste their money too,sometimes their is no effect of this and we just lose our amount and even we can not repair our old coverings.
In conclusion,although it is essentical to maintain your skin to look young ,but it also burn your skin sometime and this is also waste of money.Therefore ,I would consider, this trend to be both useful as well as damaging.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0
The response addresses the prompt by discussing both the positive and negative aspects of purchasing products and treatments to look younger. The student takes a clear position, stating that it has both beneficial and harmful sides. Ideas are presented, such as social demands and skin damage, but they tend to be repetitive and lack deep development or specific examples. Phrases like 'wasteage of money' and 'burn their skin' are repeated across paragraphs without much elaboration. While all parts of the prompt are covered, the development remains somewhat superficial and general. Therefore, this performance fits the Band 6 descriptor well, as it addresses all parts with relevant ideas, though some are under-developed.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0
The essay is divided into four paragraphs, including an introduction and conclusion, giving it a coherent overall arrangement. However, referencing and cohesion are frequently faulty. There are mechanical errors in punctuation and spacing, such as missing spaces after commas ('advantages,I', 'drawbacks,making'), and referencing pronouns are sometimes unclear ('by all this they waste their money', 'sometimes their is no effect of this'). Paragraphing is present, but internal cohesion lacks flexibility and relies on repetitive transitions like 'Firstly' and 'Secondly'. Progression is somewhat hindered by these mechanical flaws. This corresponds to a Band 5.0 or 5.5 performance, leaning towards 5.0 due to inadequate and repetitive cohesive devices.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
The lexical resource is limited and adequate for basic communication. The student attempts less common vocabulary such as 'benefical', 'graceful', and 'consequences', but there are noticeable spelling errors ('benefical', 'essentical', 'wasteage') and awkward word choices ('shop too much products', 'lose our amount'). Collocations are occasionally unnatural, such as 'repair our old coverings'. While the vocabulary allows the writer to express basic ideas about skincare and aging, the frequent lexical errors and repetition of words like 'skin', 'money', and 'spend' restrict the score to Band 5.0.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, such as conditional structures ('if humans buy more... sometimes they burn their skin') and concessive clauses. However, grammatical accuracy is weak, with frequent errors in verb forms, articles, and prepositions ('shop too much products', 'each goods is not suitable', 'their is no effect'). Punctuation and spacing issues are also pervasive throughout the text. While the meaning is generally communicated despite the errors, the high frequency of grammatical slips prevents the response from reaching a Band 6.0, aligning it more closely with Band 5.0.
See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.
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