Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-01
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Nowadays it's possible for people to buy many products or pay for treatments that help them to look younger.
Is this a good thing or a bad thing?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
In recent times, we have seen an increase of products and beauty procedures that aid in reducing ageing. Although these developments can provide some benefits, I strongly believe they are positive trends when used wisely.
One major advantage of such product is that it helps to build confidence and well being. We as human suffer from skin issues such as acne and rashes which can reduce and truncate a persons, self esteem. Problems such as these increases inferiority complex which can lead to comparisons to public figures or what is being seen online. So beauty products like vitamin c, toners and so on help largely to curb such issues, which builds confidence and esteems.
Also, with the increase in beauty products and anti-ageing schemes we have seen the influx of beauty and skin care companies such as Rhode by the beautiful Hailey bieber. Due to people being concerned about their skins,we have seen that skin care is now priortized. With the creation of companies such as Rhode, Kylie Skin and even Fenty beauty people can now experiment with products that will help treat their problems. Companies like Fenty beauty has a soft place in the hearts of individuals especially black and coloured ones because it was created to cater to them.
However, we have some disadvantages with these procedures because people become obsessed with looking youthful they do not check or investigate the products which they use, they forget that in as much as these products and treatments can help you, that they are also chemicals which can lead to diseases such as skin cancer and other skin diseases associated with them.
In conclusion, I believe the development of these treatments help boost self confidence, beauty and self-esteem but individuals should also be open to learn that they do have side effects.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5
The response addresses all parts of the task by taking a clear position that anti-ageing products and treatments are a positive development when used wisely. The main ideas are generally relevant, but some are developed more fully than others. For example, while the discussion on boosting self-esteem through skincare products is clearly articulated with examples like vitamin C and toners, the paragraph discussing celebrity brands such as Rhode and Fenty Beauty becomes somewhat descriptive rather than directly supporting whether these treatments are a good or bad thing. To reach the next level, all ideas need to be thoroughly extended and supported throughout the essay without shifting focus into mere listing of brands.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5
The essay presents a coherent overall arrangement with a clear stance established in the introduction and reinforced in the conclusion. Paragraphing is utilised, separating distinct points such as psychological benefits, industry growth, and potential health risks. However, cohesion is sometimes mechanical or faulty, as seen in transitions like 'Also, with the increase...' which create a slightly disjointed flow between body paragraphs. Referencing and conjunctions are adequate to guide the reader, but achieving the next band requires smoother transitions between sentences and more flexible use of cohesive devices to connect complex ideas seamlessly.
Lexical Resource: Band 6.0
The writer demonstrates an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, attempting less common lexical items such as 'truncate', 'inferiority complex', and 'influx'. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation, such as 'We as human suffer' instead of 'humans', and minor punctuation or word-form issues like 'priortized' instead of 'prioritized'. While these errors do not impede communication, lifting this criterion to the next band would require a more precise, flexible range of vocabulary used with greater stylistic awareness and fewer slips in spelling and word choice.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5
The response displays a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating attempts at complex structures such as conditional and concessive clauses. There are several grammatical errors, including subject-verb agreement issues like 'Problems such as these increases', article omissions, and awkward prepositional phrases or punctuation errors, as observed in 'in as much as these products and treatments can help you, that they are also chemicals'. These errors are frequent enough to prevent the essay from achieving a higher band, though they rarely impede overall communication. To improve, the writer needs to increase the proportion of error-free sentences when deploying complex structures.
See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.
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