Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-03

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Nowadays it's possible for people to buy many products or pay for treatments that help them to look younger.

Is this a good thing or a bad thing?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Nowadays , poeple can easily buy products or undergo treatments that help them look younger while some believe that it can boost their confidence . I believe that , this trend has major negative impact. This essay will discuss both perspective.

One of the main cencern of anti-aging treatment and product has negative impact on people's health.Many indivituals choose cosmetic procedures such as skin treatment, injection , surgeries which cost too much and it can be side effect if procedure did not goes well. For example, since many people are so obessed with beauty treatment , they done their surgey by unliecense doctors , which can be life treatened .

Another major cercern is this treatment or surgeries set beauty standard to common people , which promoted by famous influecer . Advertising and social media often promoted this unrealistic exepctation and youthful appearence which can pressure people desire to look more younger . Furthermore it can be expensive for many people . For example , nowadays people who earn more money or rich people they spend their money on this unneccesary treatment .Susc as famous actror actress or well known infuecer. However , this treatment can give quick result of look younger but it has so many negative things that cannot be deny .

In conclusion,altouhg products and treatment that promise a younger appearancemay boost confidence for some people. I believe that it promote unrealistic beauty standard and waste of money .and

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response5.0
Coherence and Cohesion5.0
Lexical Resource5.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.0
Overall5.0

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

The response addresses the task only partially. Additionally, it must be noted that the length requirement of 250 words is not met, as the essay contains 242 words. The writer attempts to express an opinion, stating that anti-aging treatments have a major negative impact, but the position is not always clear or consistently maintained throughout the essay. For example, the introduction states that the essay will discuss both perspectives, yet the body paragraphs focus almost exclusively on negative aspects without a balanced discussion. Ideas are limited and under-developed; points regarding health risks and unrealistic beauty standards are introduced with simple examples such as unlicensed doctors and famous influencers, but they lack sufficient extension and deep elaboration to fully satisfy the prompt.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The essay displays some organization, but there is no clear overall progression across the text. While basic paragraphing is attempted, the logical flow between sentences and paragraphs is frequently disrupted. Cohesive devices are used rather mechanically or inaccurately, such as the repetitive use of 'For example' and the abrupt transition 'However, this treatment can give quick result...'. Furthermore, referencing is not always clear, and the conclusion is fragmented and incomplete, trailing off with an unjoined sentence fragment. These structural and cohesive weaknesses prevent the response from achieving a higher level of logical arrangement and smooth progression.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The vocabulary used is limited but minimally adequate for the task. The writer attempts some less common topical items, such as 'cosmetic procedures', 'unrealistic expectation', and 'youthful appearance', but these are accompanied by noticeable errors in word choice, word form, and spelling. Examples of lexical inaccuracies include 'cencern' instead of concern, 'indivituals', 'obessed', 'unliecense', 'treatened', 'influecer', 'exepctation', 'Susc' instead of Such, 'actror', and 'altouhg'. These persistent spelling mistakes and awkward word forms cause some difficulty for the reader and restrict the lexical score to this level.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The writer demonstrates a limited range of structures, relying mostly on simple sentences alongside attempts at complex forms that are often faulty. There are frequent errors in grammar and punctuation, which can cause difficulty for the reader. Issues include unnecessary commas, such as 'I believe that , this trend', subject-verb agreement errors like 'treatment or surgeries set', incorrect verb forms such as 'they done their surgey', and missing articles or prepositions. For instance, the phrase 'if procedure did not goes well' and 'waste of money .and' show poor control over clause structures and punctuation boundaries, keeping the grammatical accuracy at a basic level.

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