Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-03

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Nowadays it's possible for people to buy many products or pay for treatments that help them to look younger.

Is this a good thing or a bad thing?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

According to my perspective, I believe that being natural is the best as compared to getting treatments done to look younger. In today's generation, it is very normal to get minor treatments done to enhance and improve your overall looks but all these treatments comes with a drawback like side effects and allergies. It is completely alright to use the products on skin to look beautiful and younger like moisturizer, cleanser, sunscreen and etc but most of the individuals go for a short cut ignoring all the basic steps. Botox, fillers and many more surgical procedures are becoming common now as it is very quick and easy to get it done within a certain time frame and you can achieve a desirable look with it. Whereas these treatments often dulls out when person grows old because the natural skin have the tendency to change its form and the substance which is injected underneath the skin stays like that throughout the life which makes it look very weird and ugly. I always promote to buy the supplements which are good for your overall well being which covers the body and face. Such supplements are vitamin d with k2, fish oil omega 3, creatine which is the most researched supplement, protein, collagen, and multivitamin in which the individual has deficiency. Getting the treatments done on your face and body gives you the best results but it is not good for the long term as it fades away and sometimes it doesn't suit all the body types and structures.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

The response addresses all parts of the task by presenting a clear position that staying natural is better than getting cosmetic treatments, while acknowledging both sides of the argument. Ideas such as the side effects of treatments and the long-term unnatural appearance of fillers are relevant and supported with examples like botox and specific dietary supplements. However, some ideas are under-developed rather than fully explored, reflecting a tendency to group multiple points together without deep elaboration, such as the brief mention of body types. The position remains clear throughout, meeting the criteria fully while showing the beginnings of more extended support.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The response presents a coherent overall arrangement and attempts to organise ideas around the central theme of natural beauty versus medical enhancements. However, the text suffers significantly from a lack of paragraphing, appearing as a single dense block of text, which limits clear progression. Cohesive devices are sometimes faulty or mechanical, with transitions like 'whereas' and 'which' used repetitively or with unclear referencing, creating a feeling of run-on sentences. While information flows from a personal stance to skincare, then surgical procedures, and finally supplements, the lack of distinct paragraphs prevents logical progression from being fully realised.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

The vocabulary used provides an adequate range for the task, successfully conveying the writer's meaning regarding cosmetic procedures and supplements. The student attempts less common vocabulary, such as 'enhance', 'substance', and specific supplement names like 'omega 3' and 'collagen'. However, there are noticeable inaccuracies in word choice and collocation, such as 'treatments comes' and 'dulls out', along with awkward phrasing like 'natural skin have the tendency to change its form'. These minor errors do not impede communication, placing the lexical range comfortably at the mid-level with occasional attempts at more sophisticated terms.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

The writing demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, utilizing relative clauses and conjunctions to link ideas, such as 'Botox, fillers and many more surgical procedures are becoming common now as it is very quick...'. There are some errors in grammar and punctuation, including subject-verb agreement issues like 'treatments comes' and 'skin have', as well as missing punctuation that leads to run-on structures. These errors rarely impede communication and the frequent presence of error-free simple structures, combined with working attempts at complex clauses, reflects solid control at this level.

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