Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-05

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Nowadays it's possible for people to buy many products or pay for treatments that help them to look younger.

Is this a good thing or a bad thing?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In recent days, many people are buying variety of products or spend on treatments that help them to look younger due to easily accessibilty and stable income source. I personally believe this is a good thing and in this essay I will state the reasons to support this viewpoint.

To begin with the positive side, firstly, people are more self aware and they pay more attention to their appearance. Because of this reason they tend to purchase cosmetic products even on higher prices and sometimes get treatment to change their looks. Secondly, due to stable income source they utilize their money on personal grooming and keep some finances reserved for the treatments. Taking an example of a female business women who runs her own business which causes daily stress, in order to get rid from her hectic schedules, she prefer to do skincare at night before sleep so that she can restrore her confidence and which ultimately gives her fresh look on next morning.

Another point worth considering is that people feel more confident when they look good. For a few people appearance does not matters but for some they feel confident and works productively and efficiently when compared with under-confident employee. Moreover, this become motivation for others to work upon their looks and appearances, means many people feel demotivated and left behind in the society where more importance is given to those with good looks. Thus, instead of spending money on other non-useful things, they visit to experts who guide them and helps them to stay positive and beautiful in their lives.

Taking everything into consideration, I beleive due to the above stated reasons people buy many products or pay for treatments that help them to look youger than their age.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The response successfully addresses all parts of the prompt by discussing whether spending money on youth-enhancing products and treatments is a positive or negative development, establishing a clear position in the introduction that it is a good thing. Relevant ideas are presented, such as increased self-awareness, confidence, and productivity in the workplace. However, some ideas are more fully developed than others; for instance, the example of the businesswoman who runs her own company and uses skincare to reduce stress is somewhat brief and tangential to the broader societal impacts. Similarly, the notion that good looks motivate others is introduced but remains under-developed. To reach a higher level, every main idea requires deeper extension and more robust, fully fleshed-out supporting examples.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response demonstrates a coherent overall arrangement with a clear introduction and conclusion, and paragraphs are generally used to group related ideas. However, cohesion is sometimes mechanical or faulty. Transition markers like "To begin with the positive side, firstly" are clunky and overused, while referencing is occasionally unclear, such as the pronoun use in "which ultimately gives her fresh look on next morning." Paragraphing is present, but internal organizational flow could be smoother to guide the reader effortlessly through the argument. To improve, the writer should employ a wider and more natural variety of cohesive devices and ensure that referencing links are precise.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The writer demonstrates an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, successfully attempting less common items such as "self aware," "personal grooming," and "stable income source." However, there are noticeable lexical errors and awkward word choices that reflect an inconsistent control of word formation and collocation, such as "easily accessibilty" instead of accessibility, "even on higher prices" instead of at higher prices, and "non-useful things" instead of unhelpful or useless things. Spelling slips also occur, such as "beleive." To achieve a higher score, the writer needs to refine word choice and collocations, ensuring greater precision and accuracy when using less common lexical items.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The response features a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating an attempt at multi-clause structures. However, there are frequent errors in grammar and punctuation that persist throughout the text, including issues with articles and prepositions within grammatical patterns, such as "in order to get rid from her hectic schedules" instead of get rid of, "she prefer to do skincare" instead of prefers, and missing articles in "on next morning" and "for some they feel confident." Punctuation errors also appear, such as comma splices and run-on structures. To move up to the next band, the writer must increase control over complex sentence structures and significantly reduce the frequency of basic grammatical slips.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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